


Bliss.

by lusciouslouanne



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Multi
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-10-25
Updated: 2013-12-14
Packaged: 2017-12-30 11:46:28
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 14
Words: 41,699
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1018231
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lusciouslouanne/pseuds/lusciouslouanne
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A hot and heavy night with Zayn and Liam prompts my retelling of how Zayn and I first met and the story of everything that happened until that night...</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

Zayn gripped his hand into my hair, yanking my head all the way back. He ordered me to my knees. I sank to the ground and did as I was told. As I started undoing his jeans, Liam got down behind me. I tore off Zayn’s pants and boxers, licking my lips, as Liam undid my bra with an expert flick.

I licked my left palm and gripped Zayn’s shaft, digging the nails of my right hand into his left hip and let out a loud groan as Liam flipped my skirt up and spanked me hard. I started stroking Zayn’s length and slowly circling his tip with my tongue when Liam pulled my lace panties aside and plunged two fingers deep inside me.

As I took Zayn wholly into my mouth, Liam slipped another finger inside me and began leaving sweet kisses and bites all along my neck. I moaned, causing Zayn’s cock to twitch in my mouth. He gripped both hands into my hair and guided my movements exactly as he wanted them.

Zayn was hissing through his teeth. He stopped suddenly, grabbed my neck, and brought me to my feet. Liam stood too, and kept biting at my shoulders. I reached my hand behind me and began stroking Liam from base to tip as Zayn crashed his mouth to mine. Our tongues fought for dominance as they led me toward the bed.

I sat on the bed, slowly scooting myself backwards towards the pillows. Zayn and Liam followed me, crawling on their hands and knees, kissing me the whole time. Zayn grabbed my shoulders and gently pushed me onto my back. His sweet, warm mouth found mine and I tangled my hands in his hair.

Liam began kissing his way back down the length of my body; my neck, my shoulders, stopping briefly to take my left breast in his mouth and tease my tender nipple with his tongue and teeth. Zayn kept my mouth busy and grabbed my hands tight together over my head while Liam continued his way down. He nipped at my left hip and agonizingly slowly removed my panties.

After dropping them to the floor, he started his way back up; kissing the tops of my feet, the insides of my ankles, tickling the back of my left knee until I could feel his breath, warm and slow, right there. He nudged my thighs apart and quickly slid two fingers inside me. He began flicking my clit with his tongue, somehow going fast and slow at the same time. I started to fight against Zayn, wanting to be able to grab Liam’s head and pull him closer, but Zayn held on hard with his left hand.

He slid his right hand around my throat and squeezed with just the right amount of pressure while he dropped his face to my chest and began kissing and biting each of my breasts in turn. Zayn tightened his grip around my throat and I came hard, bucking my hips toward Liam. He pushed them back to the bed with both hands and kept going.

I needed a minute to gather myself but they had me completely overpowered. I leaned my head forward and started biting at Zayn’s neck and shoulder, working my way to his left ear. I nibbled on the fleshy lobe for a brief moment and then swiftly slid my tongue into his ear, which I knew made him crazy.

It distracted him long enough that he loosened his grip on my wrists and I was able to slide them free. I was going to have to move fast to get what I needed.

I put my right hand to Zayn’s chest and pushed him back slightly while simultaneously grabbing Liam’s chin in my left hand and pulling him towards me. None of us had spoken a single word to this point so when I finally did, my voice came out hoarse and shaky.

"I want to try something," I said, still trying to catch my breath.

I took Liam’s hands and pulled him toward my end of the bed, pushing him back onto the pillows. I got on my knees and straddled Liam’s thighs reverse-cowgirl style. I bit my bottom lip and beckoned Zayn toward me with my finger and my best come-hither stare. His jaw dropped a little and his eyes widened as he realized what I wanted. We’d discussed this before.

"Lou…" he said slowly, "are you sure, babe?"

I just smiled and nodded my head. He came toward me shaking his head and smirking. “OK, then.”

He sat down across from me and draped his legs over Liam’s. Liam started.

"Whoa, whoa! What exactly is it that she wants? Because if you think-"

"Liam, relax. Nothing like that," Zayn chuckled. "You’re gonna enjoy this, I promise."

I giggled and took Zayn’s face in my hands, giving him a chaste kiss on the lips. “Thank you,” I whispered.

Zayn smiled up at me and put his hands on my hips. I took a deep breath and placed my hands on Zayn’s shoulders to steady myself.

I turned my head to look at Liam. “Li, open the top drawer of the nightstand there and grab two condoms.”

"Two?"

"Yes, two."

He opened the drawer, removed the condoms and handed them to Zayn.

"You’re gonna want to keep one for yourself, mate," Zayn said, only taking one.

"Wha-ohhhh!!" Liam gasped, realization finally dawning on him. I saw his confusion lift and gave him a conspiratorial wink.

I turned back to Zayn and wrapped my arms behind his neck. I tilted my hips up and kissed him again. I took another deep breath and slowly lowered myself onto both of them. My eyes rolled back in pleasure and Zayn nipped at my throat while Liam pulled my head back by my hair. As I took both of them in completely, I relaxed, letting them work out a rhythm.

We were completely intertwined with each other - thrusting, gasping, moaning. Liam gripped into my hips, Zayn grabbing my breasts and then brilliant colors exploded behind my eyelids and my spine shook with the force of my orgasm. They let me ride it out and just as I was coming down they both thrust into me as hard as they could. The three of us climaxed together and collapsed on the sheets all tangled limbs, sweat, and bliss.


	2. Chapter 2

Okay, let’s rewind a little. Back before Zayn knew what I wanted in the bedroom from the look in my eyes. Back to the day we first met, almost 2 years ago…

"Lauren!! Get your ass out of bed RIGHT NOW!!"

I groaned loudly at my mother’s use of my full first name. I rolled over and shoved a pillow over my head. I had promised to be a model at her salon today. She had just hired 2 apprentices and was teaching a class on a new color technique to them and the rest of the staff. My hair remained astoundingly healthy for all the things I let her students do to it over the years, so I was pretty much a permanent fixture in these classes. This morning, however, I had absolutely no desire to play guinea pig. I had the worst hangover of my life!

My mother started banging on my bedroom door and shouting threats from the other side about what she would do to me if I made us late. I got up quickly and started dressing before she opened the door.

"C’mon, Lou. We have to leave in 5 minutes."

"Yeah, fine. Let me just grab some aspirin. And can I borrow a pair of sunglasses? Some jerk stepped on mine at the bar last night."

"Just one more reason you shouldn’t have been at the bar last night, huh?" she chided.

I rolled my eyes at her and then moaned because even that hurt.The last thing I needed right now was another lecture about my drinking. Let me be clear, I am by no means an alcoholic, but I like to have fun. I recently turned 23 and my definition of “fun” just happens to include a few pints. My mother thought I had been going overboard in the last few months though and had started nagging me more and more.

Not having the time for make-up, I decided to just scrub out completely. I threw on some ex-boyfriend sweatpants and a zip-up and followed her out the door.

We drove the 20 minutes to the salon in complete silence. She parked and went straight inside. I knew from experience it was going to be at least another 15 minutes before she needed me so I hung back for a quick smoke in the parking lot.

I stood there smoking and pulled out my phone.

To: Kelsey  
Sent: 8:56am  
Thanks for getting me home safe last night boo

From: Kelsey  
Received: 8:56am  
No prob boo you shoulda been nicer to that guy that broke your sunglasses tho. He was hot!!

To: Kelsey  
Sent: 8:57am  
Whatever I didn’t text you so I could get a lecture :p

From: Kelsey  
Received: 8:58am  
It was an accident and he was def into you before you tore him apart

To: Kelsey  
Sent: 8:58am  
Ugh hush woman just pick me up at 1130

I laughed and put my phone in my pocket. She wasn’t wrong. He was hot and he had been checking me out from across the bar all night. He was just my type, too: tall, dark, and tattooed. But I was drunk and those were my favorite sunglasses. He and his friend were walking past me to leave and he bumped into me, knocking them out of my hand. Before he could stop himself, he’d taken another step and crushed them under his big, stupid feet. He started to apologize but I’d already had 3 pints and wasn’t hearing any of it. I went full Hulk-smash on him and Kelsey had had to step between us and tell him to walk away before it got worse.

"It gets worse than this?!” he asked, raising his eyebrows incredulously.

"I haven’t even BEGUN, motherfucker!! You heard her, walk away!" I kept shouting at him until he was out of sight.

I groaned at the memory. Not my finest hour.

I took one last drag from my cigarette and walked in the back door of the salon, straight to the coffee pot. I grabbed the biggest mug I could find from the cupboard above the machine and bent down to the mini-fridge below to seek out my favorite flavored creamer. My mom walked up behind me as I finished filling my mug.

"Lou, sweetie, you’re gonna be at my station with Zayn today."

"Okay. Which one is Zayn?" I asked, turning around.

"Zayn! Come meet my daughter!" she shouted at someone I couldn’t quite make out in the blinding sunlight coming through the front windows.

And then there he was, the jerk from the bar, right in front of me.

"Fuck," we both whispered simultaneously.


	3. Chapter 3

My mother turned back and forth between the two of us.

"You two know each other?"

"Yeah, we-"

"NOPE!" I cut him off. "Never met. Zayn, was it? Nice to meet you, I’m Lou. Let’s get to work!" I shot him a fake smile and grabbed him by the elbow to steer him towards my mom’s station.

"You’re touching me," he said, and roughly pulled his arm out of my grip.

"Yeesh, don’t flatter yourself. It wasn’t great for me either."

He smirked at me. “Let’s just get this over with, shall we? And then we never have to speak again.”

"Yeah, except it’s like, your first week. This apprenticeship with my mother is over a year long."

"Shit."

"Listen, Zayn. About last night-"

"Okay, everyone! Let’s get things started!" my mom interrupted me.

"Shut up. I’m learning," he said and turned my chair toward the mirror.

Crap. He was so much hotter than I remembered. And here I was, no make-up, in my ex’s sweats, looking like a pile of…well, crap. This was going to be the longest class I ever sat for.

….

My mother had finished the tutorial and was now walking around the room advising the other stylists applying color to their models. She was with Kristen on the other side of the room so I decided to try apologizing again.

"So, about last night-"

"Stop talking, I’m concentrating."

"Okay…so when did you-"

"Are you physically incapable of keeping your mouth shut? I’d be happy to do it for you."

I caught his eye in the mirror.

"You really shouldn’t make a promise you can’t keep."

"Oh, I’ll keep it. Now shut up, your mom is coming over here."

"Looks good so far, Zayn. How are you two getting along?"

"Fine, Mom." I gave her the best fake smile in my arsenal.

"Good." She gave Zayn a few pointers and walked away again.

….

I sat in the chair while my color processed, flicking through a magazine and drinking my coffee. I could feel his eyes boring holes in the side of my face from across the salon. He was stood over there with the rest of the stylists. Shit, was he talking about me? About last night? I’ve known some of these women since I was a little girl and I really didn’t need them knowing what I was like after a few drinks. I chanced it and glanced over at him. He looked right into my eyes, gave me a quick smirk and walked out the back door. What the hell was that?

Kristen walked over to my chair then. We’d been close ever since she apprenticed with my mom 8 years ago. She gave me a sly smile and leaned in close.

"What the hell did you do to the new guy?"

"What? Why? What did he say?" SHIT!

She laughed her big, loud laugh. “Nothing but he’s been staring at you so hard I thought your hair was going to catch fire. He’s known you half a morning and he’s already in love with you. Take it easy on him, killer. He doesn’t know you like I do.” She winked at me and walked away.

I usually trusted Kristen’s intuition but there was no way she had this one right. Zayn was definitely not in love with me. I needed Kelsey’s advice.

To: Kelsey  
Sent: 10:24am  
So sunglasses guy is my mom’s new apprentice. And I’m his model.

From: Kelsey  
Received: 10:24am  
Haha! You better hope he doesn’t turn your hair green!!

To: Kelsey  
Sent: 10:25am  
Very funny! Kiki thinks he’s in love with me. She’s obviously crazy.

From: Kelsey  
Received: 10:25am  
Good luck with that hahaha

Fat lot of help she was. I put my phone away as Zayn started walking back over to me.

"Well," he stared deep into my eyes.

"Well, what?" His gaze was starting to unsettle me a little. Kristen may have seen love there but I was seeing a lot of anger.

"Up. Let’s get you rinsed."

….

Zayn finished blow-drying my hair, I stood and turned to face him. He was giving me that intense stare again.

"What? Do I have something on my face?"

He chuckled under his breath. “I’m gonna do you a favor.”

"Oh, yeah? What’s that?"

"I’m gonna let you take me out tonight to make up for your behavior yesterday. And if you’re a very good girl, I may just keep that promise."

"And what exactly gave you the impression that I want to take you out?"

"Oh, you do. You’ve already fallen madly in love with me."

He snatched my phone out of my hand and started tapping at the screen.

"Um, excuse me, Mr. Cocky Bastard. Can I have my fucking phone back please?"

His cell phone buzzed. He tossed mine back to me and started walking away. “See you at 9!” He called over his shoulder.

"Wait! How am I-"

My phone buzzed. I had a new text.

From: ZM  
Received: 11:12am  
I’ll meet you at the bar. Don’t be late.

Well, shit.


	4. Chapter 4

I stood in the salon’s front parking lot smoking and waiting for Kelsey to pick me up.

To: Kelsey  
Sent: 11:28am  
Hurry up bitch it’s cold out here

She stopped in front of me a minute later and rolled the passenger window down as I was flicking the end of my cigarette into the ashtray.

"Is that any way to speak to the woman who stopped you from committing murder over a pair of sunglasses last night?" she called from the front seat.

I got in and turned to her, “I’m sorry, I love you. Now drive.”

I didn’t say a word until we were sat at our favorite booth in our favorite restaurant with a beer in front of me.

"Little early for that don’t you think?"

"I’m sorry, I didn’t realize I was lunching with my mother."

"Ooooh, touchy!"

"Sorry. I need a little hair of the dog. I also need a drink for what I’m about to say." I took a deep pull from my glass. "I think I have a date with sunglasses guy tonight."

Her eyes got huge. “I’m sorry, what?!”

"I can’t go out with him right? He works for my mom. And he’s a jerk. And he’s so unbelievably cocky. He said the most ridiculous things to me."

"You’re rambling," she teased me.

"He told me to shut up like 15 times and spent the whole day staring at me and then said that I was in love with him! Can you believe that? He’s obviously crazy. And did I mention he’s a jerk? I could never be with a guy like that.”

"Which one of us are you trying to convince?"

I narrowed my eyes and stuck my tongue out at her. “Let’s just eat so you can take me back to my car. I need to drive this one out.”

….

It was 8:10pm. I had less than an hour before I was supposed to meet Zayn at the bar and I was still sitting at my vanity staring at my phone. I had been driving around town all afternoon trying to figure out what I wanted to do. I came home and picked out an outfit, set my hair in hot rollers, and started doing my make-up; but I still wasn’t sure what I was going to say when I unlocked my phone and started composing a text to him.

To: ZM  
Sent: 8:16pm  
Sorry, I have to cancel tonight. I’m not feeling well. Rain check?

Lame, I know, but it was the best I could come up with. I took my outfit off the bed and was walking to the closet to hang it back up when my phone buzzed.

From: ZM  
Received: 8:19pm  
Nice try. You’ve got 40 minutes.

Jerk. I tossed my dress and heels back on the bed and sat down to finish my make-up.

….

I dawdled at home as long as I could, but still got to the bar at 9:01pm. I walked through the front door and spotted him immediately. At my table. Flirting with the waitress. Jerk! He turned around and noticed me coming toward him and his eyes darkened. Crap. Why was I doing this?

He stared me down as I approached the table. I could feel the color rising in my cheeks.

"You’re late."

"Good evening to you, too. And I’m barely late. It’s 9:02."

"I can’t tell if you’re trying to convince me or dissuade me from keeping my promise."

"And just how were you planning to keep that promise?" Hey, he might have been a jerk, but he was a hot jerk and my curiosity was piqued.

“If I was going to keep my promise, I have a number of ways that I’d like to try.” Damn!

This was the first chance I’d really had to get a proper look at him. At this point, I must retract all earlier statements about his looks. Zayn was not hot. He was beautiful. And when the light hit his face the right way, it was literally breathtaking. His eyes were like pools of the most gorgeous honey, surrounded by thick, black lashes that most girls would kill for.

I had a sudden urge to bite at his perfectly sculpted jaw. I tried to distract myself by looking at his mouth. Bad idea! He had an annoyingly sexy habit of tucking his lower lip behind his front teeth. I wanted to pull it out and suck on it. Shit, what was he doing to my head?!

By the end of the night I was more confused about what was happening between us than I had been at the start. I couldn’t tell if he liked me, hated me, or was just playing with me. When I’d had enough I told him I thought I should head home. He offered to walk me to my car and I accepted.

We walked across the lot in silence until I approached my door.

"Well, night, I guess." I said and turned to unlock the car.

He grabbed me lightly by the wrist and turned me back to face him. “What, no goodnight kiss?”

My mind blanked. Kiss? You? Me? “Do you want a goodnight kiss?” I wasn’t sure I wanted to hear the answer.

He took both my hands in his, pressed his body against mine, and slowly stepped forward until I was leaning back against my car. My heart was racing. Did I want this? He moved his face in close to mine and I shut my eyes expecting to feel his soft lips on mine. But he didn’t kiss me. He reached up with his right hand and grabbed my jaw hard turning my head to the left, keeping pressure on my throat. He lowered his head and grazed his teeth along my collarbone and then quickly turned me around so I was facing away from him. My right arm was trapped between my body and the car and he had the left one pinned behind me. He flicked the bottom of my dress up and I gasped.

"Lace boy shorts. Not what I was expecting," he said in a husky whisper, cupping my ass. I was too shocked to speak. He gave my butt a hard slap and then rubbed the spot in soft circles before pulling my dress back down. "I’ll call you," he whispered, and when I turned around to face him he was already halfway back to the front door of the bar. I climbed into my car and caught a glimpse of myself in the mirror before turning the key over in the ignition.

What the fuck just happened?!


	5. Chapter 5

I drove straight to Kelsey’s, marched up her front steps, and pounded on the front door until her little brother swung it open, rubbing sleep out of his eyes.

"Out of the way, pipsqueak. This is a crisis situation. KELSEYYYY!" I took off up the stairs, right to her bedroom door. I let myself in and flopped down face-first on her bed. "Tell me I’m an idiot."

"Fine, you’re an idiot. What happened?"

"I went out with sunglasses guy."

"What? You said you were going to stay in tonight."

"I know! I tried to blow him off but he wouldn’t blow. He’s like something sticky that won’t blow off," I said, quoting an old episode of Grey’s Anatomy.

She laughed. “Alright, Cristina. So what happened?”

I sat up and spent the next 15 minutes regaling every detail of my date with Zayn, staring at my shoes. When I finished and looked up at her, she was just gaping at me open mouthed. “Well….say something!” I shouted.

"Dude, you are so screwed."

"Gee, thanks."

"No, I’m serious. You are so, so screwed. You totally love him!”

"Oh my god, I do not! Don’t be so over-dramatic."

"Lou. You just spent 5 minutes describing how pretty his mouth is. I’ve seen it. It’s a mouth."

"Fuck." I fell back on the bed and pressed the heels of my palms into my eyes. "What am I gonna do?"

"Sleep with him?"

"Don’t joke, you’re not funny. I can’t be with this guy. I explained all this to you at lunch today, remember?"

"Okay, then don’t go out with him again. Problem solved."

I slowly opened my right eye and peeked at her around my hand. “Is it really that easy?”

"Honestly, no. Because you’re not going to listen to me anyway. You will go out with him again. And then you’ll come over here begging me to tell you you’re an idiot again. So let’s just skip all that; I’ll say it now, ‘you’re an idiot, I told you so.’”

I groaned, rolled off the bed, and kissed the top of her head. “You’re right, boo. Crisis averted.”

I slowly trudged down her stairs and when I got to the front door I heard her yell down from upstairs, “You’re welcome!”

I chuckled and called back a loud ‘thank you’ before walking back to my car. She was right, as usual. I should know better by now. Every guy I’ve ever dated has been emotionally unavailable or psychologically damaged or just a complete fuckwad, and I’m always the one that ends up downward spiraling when it all blows up. And Kelsey was always there to pick up my pieces.

 

Part of me was jealous of Kelsey’s love life, which was the complete polar opposite of mine. She and Niall had been together since 7th grade. No breaks, no hesitations, no other people since we were 12 years old. They just loved each other. End of.

….

The next morning I decided my car needed a good washing so I set out for the driveway with a bucket and sponge. After I had Barbie all rinsed and dried, I sat on the front porch for a cigarette. As I was setting my lighter down an unfamiliar, sleek, black car pulled into the drive. The driver’s side door opened and out stepped…Zayn. What the fuck was he doing here?

"What the fuck are you doing here?"

"Good morning, Lou. Yes, it is lovely out today.”

I ignored his sarcasm. “Seriously how do you know where I live?”

"I followed you home from the bar last night."

"Liar. I didn’t come straight home last night."

He smiled his irritatingly handsome half smile, “Get over yourself, babe. Your mom asked me to come by and get a list of things she needs from the beauty supply before Tuesday.”

"Oh. Right. Well, she’s inside, so…" I gestured toward the front door.

He didn’t move. I exhaled my smoke and looked him in the eye, “What, do you want an embossed invitation?”

He inclined his head toward the hand holding my cigarette. “I’ll wait.”

I tossed it immediately, not wanting to spend any more time with him than necessary. “Whatever, let’s go then,” I said standing and making my way inside the house.

He came over the threshold behind me and shut the door. I started to walk through the foyer to the kitchen, but Zayn grabbed my waist and stopped me. I started to turn around but he held me still. I felt his hand on my ass.

I whipped around. “Um, excuse me?”

"You had some dirt on your shorts."

"Yeah, right. Mom," I called out. "Zayn’s here!"

I stomped up the stairs to my bedroom. Jerk.

….

I woke up 3 hours later, not having remembered falling asleep in the first place. I checked my phone: 1 missed call from Kelsey and 2 missed texts. One from Kelsey and one from Zayn. I decided to ignore Zayn’s and opened Kelsey’s, which I had only missed by a few minutes.

From: Kelsey  
Received: 11:49am  
OMG seriously call me stat

I dialed her right away and she picked up half a ring later.

"Oh my god, where have you been? I called you like 2 hours ago."

"Why are you so obsessed with me?"

"Shut up. I was at the mall this morning and saw Sunglasses coming out of Victoria’s Secret alone. With a box. If he’s got someone to buy that kind of stuff for, why is he playing grab-ass with you in parking lots?"

"And my parents’ front hall."

"WHAT?!?"

"Never mind, I’ll tell you later. Hold on a sec, he texted me earlier but I was sleeping."

From: ZM  
Received: 10:41am  
Check the front porch.

Weird. “Kels? I’ll call you right back.”

"Okay, bye."

I ended the call and practically flew down the stairs, whipping the front door open. I stepped outside and looked around for a minute, not quite sure what it was I was looking for. And then I spotted it. A Victoria’s Secret box tucked behind one of the porch columns. I bent down and read the card that was stuck to the top.

'9pm. Be wearing this and don't be late!'

I flipped it over and there was an address on the back. I snatched the box up and ran back to my bedroom to open it. I tore out the glittery pink tissue paper to reveal what was underneath: black lace boy shorts and a matching corset.

I grabbed my phone and dialed Kelsey again. “Hey! What’s going on?”

"I have a feeling my life is about to get a lot more interesting…"


	6. Chapter 6

45 minutes later Kelsey, Niall, and I were sitting on my back porch. After we hung up, Kelsey had picked Niall up and come straight over.

"You are not seriously considering this. Are you?"

"I don’t know, Kels. There’s a part of me that really wants to play along with whatever this game is, but there’s a bigger part that’s screaming at that part to shut up and run the other way."

"That’s the part you should listen to, Lou. Even I think this is crazy," Niall said.

"I know."

"You’re gonna do it anyway, aren’t you?" Kelsey asked me. I looked up at her guiltily. "Oh my god, what are we even doing here? You don’t know this guy. That address could be anywhere and he wants you to show up alone. In LINGERIE!!! I came over to talk you out of this insanity and you’re not even going to listen to me. Niall, let’s go."

"Kelsey, wait. I know it’s crazy, but there is something so intriguing about him. He obviously enjoys games and if I have to play along for a little while to get to know him better then shouldn’t I take the chance? What if it turns out to be the most fun I’ve ever had with someone?"

She sat staring at me for an almost uncomfortable length of time. I knew to keep my mouth shut when she looked at me like this, she was hatching a plan. I risked a glance in Niall’s direction. He gave me a nearly imperceptible shake of the head. Finally, Kelsey spoke.

"Fine. But Niall and I are going to follow you and stay at the nearest coffee shop we can find in case you need us."

I jumped in her lap and started squeezing her. “Ooh thank you thankyouthankyou!!!”

She laughed and pushed me off of her. “Yeah, yeah, yeah. Don’t make me regret this. If he turns out to be some kind of psycho murderer, I’m going to kill you.”

"Be back here at 8 o’clock," I said, hugging her again. "You’re the best!"

….

I heard a knock on my bedroom door at 7:45pm.

"Are you decent?" Niall called from the other side.

"Rarely, if ever," I yelled back. "You can come in anyway."

He opened the door with his hand covering his eyes.

I laughed, “I’m dressed, asshole.”

"Oh," he uncovered his eyes, shut the door, and sat down on the bed across from me. "Changed your mind about this yet?"

"No, Ni. And I’m not going to. I meant what I said earlier, I am really intrigued by Zayn and I want to know how this is going to play out. Where’s Kelsey?"

"She’s downstairs talking to your parents."

"She’s not telling them, is she?!"

"No, no, of course not. But she considered it. She’s worried about you."

"I know, but-" Kelsey walked in then, interrupting me.

"Alright, so we googled the address and it’s a house. There’s a diner about half a mile away and we’ll have our phones on the whole time," she said seriously.

"You guys don’t have to do this," I said, shaking my head at her.

"Yeah, I’m gonna pretend you didn’t say that." She turned and sat down next to Niall on my bed.

The three of us sat and talked while I put the final touches on my make up and curled my hair. Niall stepped into the hallway while Kelsey hooked and laced me into the corset.

Once we had my ample chest securely strapped in (Zayn had underestimated my cup size), Kelsey waited in the hall with Niall for me to finish dressing. I quickly slipped into the lace panties and some nude, thigh-high stockings. I had spent the better part of the afternoon debating what to wear to complete the outfit, and decided on a tight leather skirt that ended just below the tops of my stockings. I grabbed my favorite black stiletto pumps and flung the door open.

"Well, how do I look?"

Niall’s jaw hit the floor and Kelsey swatted his chest with the back of her hand.

"You look gorgeous. Now put a fucking jacket on before this idiot has a heart attack," she said, giving Niall another quick smack. I laughed and grabbed my leather coat from the back of my bedroom door.

"Alright then, let’s do this," Niall said as he led the way down the stairs to the front door. I called out a quick goodbye to my parents, and followed Kelsey and Niall outside. Once inside my car, I plugged the address into my cell phone’s GPS app and checked my make up in the rear view mirror.

"This could be one of the greatest or one of the stupidest things you’ve ever done," I said to my reflection as I started the car and backed out of the driveway.

….

 

I pulled up to the house half an hour later, and parked on the street. I got out and was navigating my way up to the front door when I saw Kelsey’s car go by slowly, Niall in the driver’s seat. He gave the horn a short double tap and continued in the direction of the diner.

I took a deep breath as I approached the door, and as I raised my fist to knock, the door swung inward.

"I’m fairly certain my note didn’t say anything about a jacket or skirt." He was leaning against the door frame, slowly trailing the length of my body with his eyes.

"You didn’t expect me to turn up just in underwear, did you?"

"No, but a man can dream," he sighed. "Hopefully, it’ll be just as easy to get you out of that underwear as it was to get you in it."

"Forget it, this was a terrible idea." I turned to leave, but he stepped out of the doorway and stood in front of me.

"Please, don’t go. I’m sorry. Come inside for a minute. I just have to finish getting ready and then we’ll go."

“Go? Go where? I’m not going out, out like this!” I knew I should have listened to Kelsey.

"We’re going to a pimps and hoes party at my friend Liam’s house. You look perfect."

"Are you serious?"

"Yeah," he hesitated, "is - is that okay?"

Was that nervousness I sensed? He was so difficult to read.

"So you want me to go to a party with you. Where I will know no one. Half naked."

"Yes?" He bit down on his lower lip, and all my self-restraint went out the window.

"Fine, hurry up then," I resigned.

He smiled and pulled me by my hand into the house. It was enormous!

"Holy crap," I whispered under my breath. "You live here?”

"Wait til you see Liam’s place," he called out as he ran up the stairs to get dressed. I wandered around the big, open rooms, waiting for him to return. All the furniture was plushy and overstuffed, every room elaborately decorated, and there were family pictures on every surface. I was bent over the cocktail table in the front room, admiring a picture of Zayn and a beautiful older woman, who I assumed was his mother, and suddenly he was behind me.

"Nice view."

Surprised, I stood and turned, too quickly, and my right ankle gave out underneath me. He was across the room in record time and caught me by the elbows before I could actually fall. He pulled me up straight and I placed my hands on his biceps to steady myself. I knew my face must have been 7 different shades of red, I couldn’t even look him in the eye. Real sexy, Lou, nice. I tried to turn away from him but he held me still, and reached up to tuck a stray lock of hair back into place. He tilted my chin up so I had to look into his face.

"You okay?" he asked gently.

I swallowed hard. His face was so close to mine. I could feel his breath, smell his skin.

"Yeah. Yeah, I’m fine. Just a bruised ego."

"Great. Let’s go." He dropped my arms and quickly pulled away from me. By the time my brain had processed his abrupt shift from tender to cold, he was already holding the front door open and looking at me expectantly.

"You coming?"

I grabbed my clutch off the table and followed him to his car. He put his arm out to stop me halfway down the drive.

"Wait here."

He backed the car out of the driveway, turned around in the street, and slowly pulled up backward, stopping next to me. The passenger door popped open from the inside and I hurried to get in, closing the door behind me.

"What was that about?" I asked him, buckling my seat belt.

"So you wouldn’t have to walk on the grass in your heels," he said.

I was momentarily stunned by how quickly the nice guy routine came back.

"Who the fuck are you?”

He laughed, wiggled his eyebrows at me, and took off onto the main road.


	7. Chapter 7

Zayn told me we were just a few minutes from Liam’s so I shot Kelsey a quick text to let her know she could stop worrying.

To: Kelsey  
Sent: 9:34pm  
We’re going to a party, you guys can go home.

From: Kelsey  
Received: 9:34pm  
Are you sure????

To: Kelsey  
Sent: 9:35pm  
Yeah, I’m fine :)

"Am I boring you?"

"What? No, no. I was just uh-"

"Let me guess, your friends think you’re insane for going out with a guy you barely know who left lingerie on your front porch?"

"A little," I said hesitantly.

"I get it. That’s nice of them. To be so concerned, I mean."

I smiled at him and let out a breath I didn’t realize I’d been holding. He pulled up in front of Liam’s house a few minutes later and I gasped audibly. He hadn’t been kidding. This house was at least 3 times as big as his own.

We got out of the car and Zayn led the way up the incredibly long driveway, me following nervously behind. He stopped suddenly and turned to face me. He saw that I was getting anxious, and grabbed my hands in both of his.

"We don’t have to go in if you don’t want to. We can go back to my house and order a pizza, rent a movie, whatever you want."

"Isn’t that exactly what a psycho killer would say? Do you even have a friend named Liam? This is all a big set-up to get me comfortable around you before you chop me up into little bite-sized bits, right?"

He sighed. “You caught me. I was planning to make a lovely stew with all your chopped up, bite-size bits.”

I laughed and relaxed, feeling the tension leave my shoulders. “Okay, Hannibal, let’s go.”

"Are you sure? We can still back out. Liam would understand."

"No, no," I shook my head at him. "It’s okay, really. I’ll be fine once we’re inside and I have a drink in my hand."

He chuckled and pulled me into him, placing a soft kiss on top of my head. He leaned down and whispered in my ear, “Not too much. I don’t want to feel like I’m taking advantage when I see you in those panties later.”

….

We walked through the giant rooms of the crowded house, looking for Liam. Zayn stopped along the way to chat to a few people. He didn’t introduce me to anyone, but kept a hand on me at all times - on my shoulder, the small of my back, intertwined with my hands - staying close, but keeping a distance. He pulled me into the only room on the first floor we hadn’t checked and immediately spotted Liam, who was holding court from behind the wet bar. I recognized him right away, he had been with Zayn the night we met. He saw us coming toward him and rushed out to greet us.

"Zayn!!" he yelled, pulling him into a bear hug. Zayn laughed, giving his friend a one-armed embrace, still holding onto me with his other hand. They released each other and Zayn dragged me closer to him.

"Li, I would like to officially introduce you to Lou."

"Lou," Liam said, taking the hand Zayn wasn’t holding and kissing my knuckles. "Zayn was right, you are much more beautiful when you’re not screaming at us."

I blushed intensely. “Thanks, I think.”

"You’re welcome. Now what are you drinking?"

"Beer, please."

"Ah, a girl after my own heart," he laughed, releasing my hand and grabbing me a beer from the mini-fridge.

"Thank you," I said, taking the bottle from him. "This house is absolutely beautiful, by the way."

"Let me take you on the grand tour," he smiled at me, taking my hand again. He started pulling me towards the stairs, but Zayn hadn’t let go. "I got her, man. Go mingle."

Zayn reluctantly dropped my hand, nodded at Liam, and walked away.

"C’mon, I have a feeling you’re gonna like this," he said taking me upstairs. He stopped at a thick, heavy door and slowly pushed it open. Inside was the largest library I had ever seen in my entire life, wall-to-wall, floor-to-ceiling, books on books on books.

"What gave you the idea that I would like this?" I asked him, wide-eyed.

"Zayn told me you love to read."

"He - he did? How does he know that? This is barely our second date. We haven’t even kissed yet."

"Listen to me," Liam said, turning me to face him. "His ex did a number on him. He hasn’t been with anyone, not seriously, since we were teenagers. But he really, really likes you. He hasn’t shut up about you since that night you almost tore his face off in the bar.”

"I-"

"Hold on, let me finish," he held his hand up to quiet me. "He hasn’t liked anyone the way he likes you in years, and he’s my best friend, so I’m only going to say this to you once. Don’t hurt him. Please."

"Can I ask you something?" I asked him breathlessly. He nodded, so I continued. "This ex of his, did she - is that why he - he can’t - he’s inconsistent."

"That’s not a question."

"I mean his mood towards me changes dramatically, frequently. One minute he’s sweet and warm, the next he’s all sharp edges. Is she the reason?"

"Probably. He likes you, but he’s a little afraid of you, too. He doesn’t want to go through what he went through with her again. I won’t give you details, that’s his story to share with you if he wants to, but she messed with his head. I’m asking you not to do that to him."

"I won’t," I promised him.

"Good, let’s get back to my guests, shall we?"

Liam and I walked back downstairs together and Zayn was at my side like a magnet.

"Come with me," he said, taking my hand. "I want to show you off."

I blushed again, but let him guide me around the house, making introductions.

….

We walked around talking to his friends for the next few hours, laughing and drinking. He left me with his friend Harry and went off in search of the bathroom.

"So, Harry, how long have you known Zayn?"

"Zayn, Liam, and I go back to high school. The three of us and our pal Louis were the ‘Fearsome Foursome,’" he chuckled.

"Oh, really?" I raised my eyebrows, laughing. "Where’s Louis tonight? I don’t think I’ve met him."

"He’s - uh, he’s not here. Louis and I had a sort of falling out a few years back. Haven’t seen him since," he mumbled the last few words into his plastic cup.

"I’m sorry. Was it a girl? There’s always a girl."

He gave me a weak smile, “Something like that.”

I opened my mouth to say more, but Zayn came up behind me, and put his arms around my waist.

"It’s after 1, princess," he whispered in my ear, "let’s get you home before we both turn into pumpkins."

"Okay," I said, stepping out of his arms and grabbing Harry to give him a hug. "It was so nice to meet you, Harry. I expect to hear some tales of the ‘Fearsome Foursome’ the next time I see you."

Zayn rolled his eyes. “Dude, you didn’t.”

"Don’t worry, I haven’t told her anything." He winked at me. "Yet."

I waved goodbye to Harry over my shoulder as Zayn pulled me off to go find Liam. I was following him across the massive kitchen toward the patio, thinking about my earlier conversation with Liam - can I really handle another guy with psychological trauma? - when he stopped in his tracks and looked into my eyes.

"Whatever Liam and Harry said to you, I just want you to know, I’m not that guy anymore, from the ‘Fearsome Foursome,’" he said, throwing aggressive air quotes around the last two words.

Shit, was he reading my mind or what? “Harry really didn’t tell me anything.”

"Maybe not, but I know Liam did. Otherwise, that was the fastest ‘grand tour’ I’ve ever seen."

I gulped, “He just-“

"No," he put a hand up to silence me. "I don’t want to know what he said, it’ll probably just make me angry. I just don’t want - I don’t - forget it. Let’s just go."

He turned and walked back across the house toward the front door. He moved so quickly I was practically jogging to keep up, which is no easy feat in 5 inch heels. I caught up with him at the end of the driveway, just as he was swinging the passenger door open for me. I climbed into the car, and just before he slammed the door, I caught a dark glint in his eyes. Great, I thought, this is going to be a lovely ride home.

….

We arrived back at Zayn’s house about 20 minutes later. I got out, not waiting for him to come around and open my door, and started walking toward my own car parked on the street.

"Lou, stop." I turned to face him.

"Oh, you want to talk now?" It came out colder than I had meant for it to, but he had been silent for the entire drive back here.

"Please," he begged, "come inside."

I narrowed my eyes at him, considering it. Angry as I was at this hot and cold thing, I had promised Liam I wouldn’t hurt Zayn. The way he was looking at me, I knew if I got in my car and just drove away, it would be the last I saw of him.

I nodded and followed him across the threshold into the front room. My feet were killing me, so I slipped out of my pumps, and stood there waiting for him to move or say something. He was looking at me with his jaw set, his mouth in a tight, firm line, but his eyes were soft, pleading. He took a deep breath and came toward me. I crossed my arms defensively, not entirely sure I wanted him to touch me, until he did. He swept my hair out of my eyes and held it behind my head with one hand, gently caressing my face with the other. I relaxed, uncrossed my arms, and placed my hands on his hips, tilting my head up to look him in the eyes again. He took this as a sign to continue.

He put both of his hands behind my neck, tangling his fingers in my hair, and pulling me close. My heart was pounding in my ears, but I let my eyes flutter closed anyway, and he kissed me. Soft and sweet at first, our lips barely touching. He dragged his right hand down my body as he opened his mouth to deepen the kiss, stopping at my ribs, just under my left breast. My breath hitched in my throat and he pulled back.

"Is this okay?" he asked, not moving.

I tried to speak, but nothing came out, so I pulled him into me, and he understood.

He kissed me again, this time full of passion. His warm tongue, kneading mine, felt like it was searching for something much more than reciprocation, there was an urgency in it. In one swift movement he lifted me by the waist, pushed my back against the wall, and slid the bottom of my skirt higher on my thighs so I could more easily wrap my legs around him, never breaking the kiss. I let out a deep groan and Zayn gripped into my thighs, pushing me harder into the wall.

He stopped kissing me abruptly and rested his forehead in the crook of my neck.

"Thank you for tonight," he whispered into my skin.

"What do you mean?" I asked, stroking his hair, my legs still wrapped tight around his midsection.

"For being so cool with my friends, and for sticking around even when I went all quiet rage," he looked up at me and ran his fingers through my hair again. "I was so scared you were going to get in your car and take off the minute we got back here. So thank you, for staying."

I took his face in both my hands and gave him a quick, firm kiss on the lips before responding.

"I don’t know what your ex did to you, Liam didn’t tell me, and I don’t want to know until you’re ready to tell me, but I will say this, I’m not her, Zayn. I’m not her, so please stop acting like you expect me to be. Like you expect me to hurt you."

"I’m sorry," he whispered, and reattached his lips to mine. He wrapped both arms around me and carried me up the stairs to his bedroom.

"You’re so beautiful," he whispered as he laid me on my back and draped his body over mine, pulling my hair, and kissing my throat.


	8. Chapter 8

Zayn and I spent the next few hours in his bed, exploring each others’ bodies with our hands and mouths. At some point or another, he had helped me out of my skirt, which was now lying on the floor next to most of his clothes. We kissed until my jaw hurt and our lips were raw.

We came up for air around 4am. I was lying on my back, arms over my head, and my legs were wrapped around Zayn’s waist. He sat back on his knees, and started running his hands slowly up and down my thighs.

"I must say, I am an excellent lingerie picker-outer," he said, appreciating the view.

I laughed, “Yes, except for the fact that you were at least a cup size off. Do you know how much work it took to stuff myself into this thing?”

"You probably shouldn’t talk about stuffing when I’ve got you in this position," he joked, biting on his bottom lip.

I dug my heels into his hips and let out a mock gasp of surprise, “Pervert!”

"Seriously though," he laughed, snapping one of my garters against my thigh, "I’m trying really hard to respect you right now, but these thigh-highs are killing me."

"Oh, now you’re concerned with my dignity? After giving me a bare-assed spanking in a parking lot last night?"

"Are we pretending you didn’t love it?" he asked, rolling on his back to lie next to me.

A content silence hung in the air between us. I was staring at the ceiling thinking how nice it was that we were this comfortable with each other so quickly. The physical chemistry was electric, everything just clicked. We hadn’t needed to speak a single word, but instinctively knew exactly what the other wanted. The best part was that I didn’t feel at all pressured by him, I knew he wasn’t expecting sex after all this. It was like being back in high school, when you could make out with a boy for hours and both of you knew it wasn’t going any further than that. High school…that reminds me…

"Hey, so what happened between Harry and Louis? Harry didn’t say much, but I feel like there’s a juicy story there."

Silence.

"Zayn?" I turned to look at him. He was sleeping, his tattoo covered chest gently rising and falling. I carefully climbed out of the bed, and slipped back into my skirt. I leaned over and gave him a soft kiss on the cheek before quietly creeping out of his bedroom and down the stairs to the foyer. I scooped my shoes up and stepped barefoot onto the front porch, making sure the latch on the knob was locked before closing the door behind me.

….

My cell’s ringtone jolted me out of a dead sleep. I checked the clock on my nightstand before snatching my phone up. 730am. I had barely slept. Who the fuck - Kelsey. Of course. I answered the call, but didn’t say anything. I didn’t need to, she was already yelling at me.

"Oh goooood, you are alive! I never got a call or a text to that effect, so how would I have known? Do you have any idea what time it is? I hardly slept all night, I was so worried. Taking off with a stranger in your underwear!! Couldn’t even be bothered to tell me you got home safely!”

"I do have a mother, you know.”

"One that would be kicking your ass right now if she knew what you did last night."

"I know, I’m sorry. Really, I am, but I didn’t get home until, like, 5 o’clock."

"You owe me lunch with that story."

I laughed, “I’ll call you when I wake up.”

I disconnected, rolled over to go back to sleep, and my phone went off again. I answered, not bothering to check the screen.

"Jesus, Kelsey! I-"

"Try again," he cut me off.

"Zayn?" Shit, he sounded pissed.

"I woke up this morning and you weren’t there."

"What?"

"You weren’t there. Is everything okay?" Not pissed then.

"I’m fine. Why wouldn’t everything be okay?"

"Because. You. Weren’t. There."

"I’m sorry, it’s Saturday. I just assumed you had to be at the salon early and you wouldn’t want to deal with kicking me out of bed."

"I never kick beautiful women out of bed," he said silkily.

"Well, next time I see a beautiful woman in your bed, I’ll be sure to let her know."

"Do you ever just accept compliments?" he asked, exasperated.

"Sorry. Many years of boyfriend-induced psychological damage. I use sex and sarcasm as weapons," I joked.

"So far I’ve only experienced the latter, but I look very forward to enjoying the former."

"Snarky boy. Are you going to let me go back to sleep now?" I begged.

"If you’ll agree to see me again tonight."

"Can’t. I’m seeing my other boyfriend tonight."

The silence on the other end of the line was deafening.

"Zayn, I’m joking. Pick me up at 830."

I hung up without waiting for a response, and fell - almost immediately - back to sleep.

….

By 1 o’clock that afternoon, Kelsey and I were across from each other in a booth at the diner I had worked at in high school.

"Tell me everything," she said after the waitress dropped off our sodas, and went to put in our lunch order.

"There’s not a lot to tell, really. We went to a party, I met his friends, we went back to his place, and made out until four in the morning," I concluded, sipping Coke through my straw.

"Well, he must be a pretty damn good kisser if that’s all you were doing until that hour."

I widened my eyes as far as they could go, and nodded my head once.

"That good, huh? Top five? Top three?"

"Off the charts," I laughed. "So what did you and Ni end up doing last night?"

"Nothing much. Shared a sundae while we waited for you to tell us you were okay. Niall asked me to move in with him, and we went back to my house and watched a movie." She said all of this very rapidly, thinking I wouldn’t catch that little golden nugget.

"It’s about fucking time!" I nearly shouted. "You’ve only been together eleven fucking years."

"Well, I just got that promotion at the gym, and Niall’s almost done with school, so the timing is pretty good."

"You know what else it’s a good time for? A ring. You need a rock, sista girl."

She laughed, “I do not need a rock. We’re going to buy a house and see how that goes before we talk about getting engaged.”

"You two are so ridiculous. You’ve known since junior high that you were going to get married. Just get on with it and make me an auntie already!"

She rolled her eyes at me as the waitress set our meals in front of us. She got our orders backwards so we waited for her to turn her back and swapped plates, laughing. “She’s still a better waitress than you ever were,” Kelsey teased me. “So when are you seeing Zayn again?”

"Tonight," I said, salting my fries. "I think."

She raised her eyebrows at me, “You think?”

"Yeah, he called me right after you did this morning. He was upset that I sneaked out while he was sleeping, and then I made a shitty joke about having another boyfriend. We’ll see if he shows tonight," I shrugged nonchalantly, and dug into my burger.

Kelsey set her fork down and gave me her serious face. “Please don’t do what you always do here. Don’t sabotage this before it starts.”

"Eat your salad," I said, not looking at her.

….

I spent the rest of the afternoon running errands, trying to keep my mind off of the fact that I hadn’t heard from Zayn since that morning. Kelsey was right. Again. As damaged as I was, I had done my fair share of damage to the men that had cared about me.

At 5:30pm I was sitting in my bedroom, dicking around online with my TV on for background noise. There was a short knock at my door, and I shut my laptop, calling out to whoever it was to come in.

"Hey, Mom," I smiled at her. She was holding something behind her back as she crossed the room and sat on my bed. "What’s up?"

"I’m going to ask you a question, and I want you to be completely honest with me. Understand?" I nodded for her to continue. "What’s going on with you and Zayn?"

I hesitated. “Uh, well - it’s, uh - that’s-“

"He’s my student, Lauren. Whatever is going on, don’t let it compromise his education."

"I won’t, I promise."

"Good. He asked me what your favorite flower was today. I’m wondering if that has anything to do with this," she said, handing me what she’d been hiding. It was an envelope with my name on the front.

I snatched the envelope out of her hand and tore it open. There was a single piece of paper inside. I carefully unfolded it, and read it in my head before laughing and handing it back to my mother to read.

“Roses are red

Violets are blue

My poetry is shitty, but

Tonight I’m making dinner for you

Be at my place at 8:30

-Zayn”

She smiled and set the note down on my bed. “At least I already know I like this one. Have fun tonight.”

"Thanks, Mom." She stood, patted my knee, and walked out, shutting the door behind her. I grabbed my phone and sent a quick text to Zayn.

To: ZM  
Sent: 5:42pm  
So does my mother know me as well as she thinks she does?

From: ZM  
Received: 5:43pm  
You’ll have to wait and see ;)

To: Kelsey  
Sent: 5:44pm  
He’s making me dinner tonight!!

From: Kelsey  
Received: 5:44pm  
Cute!! I’m coming over to help you pick an outfit

To: Kelsey  
Sent: 5:45pm  
God bless you

I opened my laptop again and resumed internet surfing until Kelsey flew through my bedroom door at 6:15.

"Jeans or a skirt?" she asked, slamming the door and throwing her purse on my bed.

"Hiiii…" I said sarcastically, setting my computer down.

"Hi. Jeans or a skirt?"

"Umm…jeans."

She went to my closet and started pulling out tops for me to try. We spent the next 45 minutes making “maybe” and “no” piles, and bickering over shoes. We decided on a dark pair of skinny jeans with a low-cut, curve-hugging white sweater that had large black roses printed on it, and beige close-toed pumps. By 7:00 I was shoving Kelsey out of my room so I could get ready.

"Curl your hair and put it half up. And wear your diamond earrings. And-"

"Goodbye, Kelsey," I said, giving her one last push and shutting the door on her.

"And LIGHT eye make up!" she yelled through the door.

….

I knocked on Zayn’s front door at precisely 8:30. He swung it open a few seconds later, and flashed me his dazzling smile.

"Hello, gorgeous. Come on in," he said. He stood back to let me in, took my coat, and gave me a soft kiss on the cheek.

I followed him across the house to the kitchen, and stopped dead in my tracks when I saw what he had laid out for me. The table was beautifully set, and there were candles and orchids everywhere. Good job, Mom. I was too surprised to speak so I just stood there like an idiot.

"You hate it," he said, moving to start clearing it away.

"No! No," I insisted, grabbing his arm to stop him, "it’s just - I can’t believe you - no one’s ever done anything like this for me before."

"So, it’s okay?"

"It’s perfect," I smiled at him. "Thank you."

I saw his body relax as a wave of relief washed over him. “Come sit here at the island while I finish dinner. Do you want a drink?”

"Of course. What are you making?"

"Chicken parmesan," he said, stirring the sauce on the stove.

"Color me impressed. Red wine then, please."

He poured me a glass and went back to the stove top. I jumped off the bar stool, and started walking around the kitchen with my wine, taking it all in.

"What are you thinking?" he asked from the counter.

"I’m thinking about how I’m going to get all these orchids home. I may have to rent a truck."

He laughed heartily, “Don’t worry about that.”

I walked around the island, set my glass down, and came up behind him, wrapping my arms around his waist. “So what else did my mom tell you about me?”

"I didn’t ask her anything else. I asked her about the flowers and she looked at me like she wanted to kill me so I handed her the envelope, and took off as fast as I could."

"Yeah, she has that effect on men that are interested in her daughter," I said, trying - and failing - to suppress my laughter.

Zayn turned around in my arms, taking my face in his hands. He kissed me, soft and slow, twirling my hair around his fingers. I moved my hands up to his chest, leaning into him. He let out a deep moan, and suddenly lowered his hands to my waist, picked me up, and set me on the counter. He pulled away from me, and gave me a dark look. I pouted and he shook his head at me. “Stay put, I don’t want to burn the chicken.”

I crossed my left leg over my right, grabbed my wine, and took a big sip to calm myself down. “You know, it’s rude to offer a woman dessert before dinner, and then take it away after one bite.”

He gave me his devilish half-smile, “I’ll be generous with the sweets later.”

I sat on the counter watching his muscular back work under his shirt as he cooked. It smelled delicious. “So who taught you to cook?”

"My mom. She’s a phenomenal cook. I don’t claim to be 10% as good, but this is my signature dish. Here, try the sauce," he said, turning around. He came toward me with the wooden spoon he’d been using to stir, blowing on it to cool it off, and put it to my lips. It tasted even better than it smelled. I licked my lips and nodded my head, savoring the wonderful mix of spices.

"Hold on, you’ve got some right…" he leaned in and licked the corner of my mouth with the tip of his tongue, as lightly as possible, sending shivers up my spine, "…there."

I put my feet against his hips, and gently pushed him away from me. “You’re gonna kill me before you feed me. That’s just mean.”

He bit down on his lower lip, put his hands up in mock surrender, and backed away slowly. “Five more minutes on the chicken. Do you cook?” he asked, changing the subject.

"I can make a mean tuna sandwich, if that’s what you mean."

He laughed, “Not quite.”

"Show me something then," I said, jumping off the counter.

"It’s all done already," he chuckled. "Besides, I’m supposed to be making you dinner, remember? Go sit at the table, it’ll be ready in a minute.”

I obeyed, giving him a quick pat on the ass as I walked by.

"I plan on returning that favor later," he said, bending to take the chicken out of the oven.

"I look forward to it."

….

We flirted our way through dinner, which was incredible. He really was a fantastic cook. I pushed my plate away from me, completely stuffed. “Do you want help with the dishes?”

He stood and took both our plates to the sink. He came back and grabbed my hand, pulling me out of my seat, “No, I think I want to try that dessert you mentioned earlier.”

"Oh, yeah?"

"Yeah," he said, grabbing my waist and tossing me over his right shoulder. He carried me up the stairs, one hand on my ass, the other arm wrapped around my knees so I wouldn’t fall. We reached his bedroom, and he stopped to close the door and throw me on the bed. I had been laughing this entire time, but stopped immediately when I saw the look on his face

"No sneaking out tonight," he said seriously, turning off the overhead light.

"Yes, sir," I said, sitting up on my elbows as he came toward me.

“Yes, sir,” he repeated, taking his shirt off, and tossing it aside. “I like that.”

He plucked my shoes off one by one, dropping them to the floor. He took my feet in each of his hands on either side of his body, settling onto the bed and stalking toward me on his knees, tipping me on my back. He released my feet and moved his hands to my thighs, slowly stroking from my hips to my knees, staring lustily into my eyes.

"I’m gonna make you scream. Are you okay with that?" he asked, still caressing my legs.

I took a deep breath and nodded slowly. He lifted my left hip from the bed and spanked me once, hard. “Say it.”

"Yes, sir."

"Good girl," he growled, and flipped me over on all fours, spanking me one more time. He grabbed my hair and pulled me up so I was kneeling with my back pressed into his chest. He ripped my sweater off, and turned my head to expose the left side of my neck. He licked a clean line from my ear lobe down to my shoulder and then blew cool air down the same path, making me shiver. "How do you want it?" he whispered in my ear.

I turned my face and locked eyes with him. “Use your hands. Go slow.”

He kissed me, hard and deep, while he undid my jeans and slipped his left hand into my panties. I laid my head on his right shoulder and grabbed the back of his neck with my left hand pulling him closer to me, and he reached his free hand up to grab my breasts. Though his mouth had been rough, his hands were gentle. Our breathing synchronized as Zayn teased my entrance. I put my right hand behind me to undo his zipper and he stopped abruptly.

"What are you doing?"

"Returning the favor," I said, confused.

"Oh, no. Tonight is all about you. Keep your hands to yourself," he said, biting my shoulder.

"Well, in that case…" I trailed off, slipping my left hand into my pants over his hand to guide him. He brought me almost to the point of climax and stopped, removing his hand and spinning me around to face him. He put his mouth to mine again and put his hands behind my back to undo my bra. He threw it on the floor next to my sweater and gently leaned me back onto the pillows. He worked his way down my body - kissing, licking, biting - from my throat to my hips, stopping at the waistband of my jeans.

"Are you sure you’re okay? I don’t want to rush you," he said softly, looking into my eyes.

"Zayn," I pleaded, "don’t make me beg."

He gave me his wicked grin and something dark glittered in his eyes. “I wouldn’t dream of it,” he said, pulling my jeans down. “Nice panties. Your other boyfriend buy you these?”

"No," I giggled, "the stuff he buys me is too hot for you to handle."

He crawled back over my body, pinning me to the bed. “That may be true, but I’m gonna make you forget all about him now.”

He smashed his lips to mine, tearing my panties to the side, and slid two fingers deep inside me. He started working his thumb in slow circles over my clit and I moaned into his mouth. He stroked my g-spot until I came, gasping for breath. I closed my eyes and focused on trying to get air in my lungs. I felt him move away from me and assumed he was going to the bathroom or something, until he ripped my panties off and his tongue was on my slit, licking me clean.

"Jesus, Zayn, what are you doing? I need a minute."

"Fuck that," he whispered, kissing the inside of my thigh, "I’m not done with you yet."

I was too tired to fight him so I just laid back and let him continue. My nerve endings were raw from the orgasm I’d just had, and Zayn was taking things painfully slowly now. My eyes rolled back in my head as I gripped the sheets and enjoyed this incredible torture.

"You wanna come again for me, baby?" he asked, and plunged his tongue inside of me, not waiting for an answer.

"Mmmhmm," was all I could manage.

He pulled back. “I’m sorry. I didn’t quite catch that,” he said, moving his tongue inside me again.

"Oh my God, yes," I breathed.

He stopped and sat back, laughing.

"Why did you stop?" I groaned.

"Give it a second." He waited a few beats while the tension built, and then shoved his fingers roughly where his tongue had just been and sucked my clit between his teeth. What followed could only be described as the greatest orgasm anyone has ever had. I never wanted to move again.

Zayn sat up on his knees and started leaving little kisses all over my body. “C’mon, beautiful. I’m drawing you a bath,” he said, standing. When I didn’t move, he threw me over his shoulder again and walked down the hall to the bathroom.

….

We sat wrapped around each other in the tub until the water got cold. There were orchids all over the bathroom, too, and he had thrown dozens of blooms in the water.

"So you knew tonight was going to end like this?" I teased.

He kissed my ear and leaned forward to take the stopper out of the drain, “I hoped.”

We got out and he bundled me in an over-sized, fluffy towel. Zayn put his arms around me and tugged at the ends of my hair. I smiled up at him, “Thank you for tonight.”

He bent and kissed me lightly on the corner of my mouth. “You’re welcome. Bed?”

I nodded and followed him back to the bedroom. I sat on the bed while he dug through his bureau.

"Here you go," he said, handing me a pair of sweatpants and a large t-shirt.

"What’s this?"

"Um, pajamas?" he laughed.

"Oh. I sleep naked. Thanks, though," I said, handing them back.

"Perfect," he said, throwing the sweats back in the drawer. He walked over to me and tore my towel off, dropping it to the floor. "I love a challenge."

"A challenge?"

"Yes, a challenge," he said, pushing me back on the bed. "Do you know how difficult it’s going to be to not fuck you senseless when you’re already wet and naked in my bed?"


	9. Chapter 9

I rolled over and reached for my phone. And reached. And reached. Where the fu- my eyes shot open, slightly panicked. Oh, right. I’m at Zayn’s. I took a deep breath, recognizing my surroundings and relaxed back into the pillows. Wait, where’s Zayn? 

Making sure the balcony blinds were closed, I got out of bed and bent to get my underwear from the pile in the corner of the room, which is, of course, when the bedroom door swung open behind me.

"Damn." Not Zayn.

I spun around, quickly grabbing random articles of clothing off the floor to cover myself with. “Oh my God, Harry! What are you doing here?”

"I could ask you the same thing."

"Dude, I’m naked!"

"Dude, I noticed," he said, shutting the bedroom door and sitting on the bed.

"Okay…are you going to get out so I can get dressed?"

"Nah. So things are going well between you and Zayn, I gather."

"What?" I just stood there, shocked. Is he seriously trying to have a conversation with me while I’m standing here naked?

"Well, you’re naked in his bedroom, you have some serious sex hair going on, and he’s downstairs right now making you breakfast."

I shook my head at him, defeated, and quickly pulled my underwear on with the sweatpants and t-shirt Zayn had picked out for me the night before. I stormed down the stairs with Harry hot on my heels.

"Your friends are perverts," I said, the second I spotted Zayn in the kitchen. He was standing at the stove wearing nothing but pajama bottoms.

"It’s really not fair to say that about all of them," he replied, "it’s just Harry."

Harry laughed, sitting on a bar stool. “True.”

Zayn came around the counter and took me in his arms. He leaned forward and kissed me on the cheek, despite the fact that I was giving him a death glare. “Don’t worry, babe. He wants nothing you’re offering,” he whispered in my ear.

"Whatever. I heard you were making me breakfast," I said, pushing him away from me, and taking a seat next to Harry. "I hope there’s bacon."

He passed me a huge platter of bacon, eggs, and toast, and poured me a mug of coffee.

"Thank you," I said, leaning across the counter to give him a kiss.

Harry cleared his throat until Zayn broke away from me. “Hey!” he said, pointing a finger at Harry, “You walk in on my girlfriend naked, you shut up and deal with it when I kiss her over breakfast.”

I nearly choked on my coffee.

"Girlfriend?!" Harry and I said simultaneously.

He smiled and scooped some food onto a plate for Harry. “Eat. Both of you.”

….

The three of us sat and ate breakfast together, Harry and Zayn talking about plans for Harry’s birthday party.

"So I was thinking this Friday, my house, the usual crew. We can get the hot tub going."

"Sounds good to me, man. Lou?" Zayn said, turning to me.

"Hm?"

"Does Friday work for you?"

"I’m invited?"

"Of course," Zayn said.

"I can make myself available. It’ll probably mean breaking my other boyfriend’s heart, though." I teased.

Zayn smirked and pinched my ass. “Very funny,” he said, narrowing his eyes at me and turning back to Harry. “Well, I guess we’ll see you Friday, then.”

"Cool," Harry said, making his way to the front door. "Bye, Lou!"

"Goodbye, Harold!"

Once Harry had shut the door behind him, I rounded on Zayn.

"Did you seriously send him up there to get me, knowing I was probably still naked?" I asked, swatting his arm.

"OW! No! I had my back to him when he asked me what I was doing, and I said making you breakfast, and when I turned around he was gone."

"Fine. We’ll put a pin in that for now. You wanna talk about the ‘girlfriend’ thing?"

"What about it?" he asked, gathering our dishes and taking them to the sink. "Come help me with these."

I came around the counter and started helping him rinse plates. “How about the fact that we’ve only known each other for five days.”

"So?"

"So? So, don’t you think that’s a little early to start throwing around big words like ‘girlfriend?’"

He set down the glass he had been holding and turned me so I was looking into his eyes. “Listen, woman. I did some things for you last night, things that I would like to keep doing. Now, as long as I’m doing those things for you, I don’t want anyone else doing them for you. So, no, I don’t think it’s too early to call you my girlfriend.”

"Does that mean I have to break up with my other boyfriend?"

He grabbed me and tossed me on the island, “You haven’t forgotten about that guy yet?”

I shook my head ‘no,’ laughing at him. He climbed onto the counter, and put his hand behind my head, lowering me onto my back and laid on top of me. “I guess I’ll have to work a little harder, then.”

Just as he attached his lips to mine and slid his hands under my t-shirt, my phone rang from my purse at the end of the counter. “Hold on, it’s probably my mom,” I said, reaching for it. “I didn’t tell her I was staying the night. Oh, shit. Even worse. You’re in trouble.” He looked at me questioningly. “Hey, Kels,” I said into the phone.

"Hey, where are you?"

I cleared my throat. “Um, Zayn’s.”

"Oh my God, you stayed over?!"

"Yeah."

"I thought you were taking things slow!"

"We are." It was only sort of a lie.

"You expect me to believe you didn’t have sex with him last night?"

"Zayn, tell Kelsey we did not have sex last night," I said, holding the phone out to him.

"We did not have sex last night," he said, loudly, and the buried his face in my neck, "but we’re trying to now."

I laughed putting the phone back to my ear, “Satisfied?”

"Whatever. Do you guys want to meet Niall and me for lunch?"

"Zayn, do you want to meet Kelsey and her boyfriend for lunch?"

He shook his head and stuck his hands up my shirt again. “I want you for lunch,” he whispered.

I rolled my eyes at him. “He said ‘yes.’ Text me the details later.”

"Okay. Use a condom."

"Bye, Kelseyyyy," I laughed, hanging up on her.

Zayn sat up on the edge of the counter with his legs dangling over the side. He grabbed my ankle and dragged me toward him. “You look so hot in my clothes, but I’d rather have you out of them,” he said, pulling the sweatpants and my panties off and throwing them across the kitchen. He lifted me off the counter and sat me on his lap, facing him. I wrapped my legs around his waist and ran my fingers through his hair. He kissed my throat, “You wanna take this upstairs?”

"I’m good here," I said, kissing him back.

He sat up to take his pants down with one hand, and put the other on the small of my back so I wouldn’t fall. I slipped my hand between us and wrapped my fingers around his length. He inhaled sharply through his teeth and grabbed my ass. “You’re on the pill, right?”

I nodded and he shoved himself into me.

….

We finished in the kitchen and Zayn chased me upstairs to the bathroom, where we went at it again in the shower.

He set me down and leaned into me against the wall. “Okay, we have to actually shower or we’re never going to be on time for lunch,” I said, pushing him under the water.

"We could skip lunch," he said, pulling me into the stream with him.

I laughed, “No, we can’t. If you want to be my boyfriend, you have to get the best friend stamp of approval. Which is going to be difficult now that you’ve corrupted my innocence.”

"Riiight."

Zayn shaved while I washed my hair and face, and then we switched so he could wash his hair and I used his razor to quickly shave my legs.

We got out and I ran downstairs to grab a camisole and my makeup bag out of my purse. When I came back into the bathroom, Zayn was standing there naked, towel drying his hair in the mirror.

"I’m gonna need you to at least put some underwear on. You’re a fucking distraction."

He turned to me, pointing at what I was carrying, “What’s that?”

"My makeup bag."

"So you knew last night was going to end like this?" he teased, throwing my words from the night before back in my face.

"Shut up. Are you gonna let me use some of your precious hair products or do I have to out looking like a giant frizz ball?"

He laughed and kissed me on the cheek as he passed me. “Help yourself, babe.”

I mixed some gel and mousse in my palm, and was finger combing it through my hair when he came back into the bathroom, now only shirtless.

"Much better," I said, "thank you."

"Do you want me to blow dry for you?" he asked, coming up behind me.

"Careful, you’re gonna make me fall in love with you."

He laughed, “Reserve judgement on that for now. Do your makeup while I fix my hair and I’ll do yours when I’m done.”

….

A little over an hour later we were on our way to meet Kelsey and Niall at the restaurant they’d picked. We were less than five minutes away when I got a text from my mom.

From: Mom  
Received: 12:53pm  
Where do you want all these flowers???

I turned to Zayn. “What did you do?”

"What are you talking about?"

"My mom just asked me where I want ‘all these flowers.’"

"Oh. That. I had Liam and Harry come by the house while we were getting ready. They were supposed to take all the orchids from the kitchen to your house, so I guess they got there."

"Can you stop being so fucking cute? It’s physically painful."

To: Mom  
Sent: 12:55pm  
Wherever you want. I’ll be home in a couple hours.

"So that’s why you offered to blow dry my hair. So you could be sure I wouldn’t catch them in the act?"

"I told you to reserve judgement."

We pulled up to the restaurant just as Kelsey and Niall were getting out of his car.

"Guys, this is Zayn. Zayn, Kelsey and Niall."

Zayn shook Niall’s hand and then turned to Kels, “Ah, Kelsey. The woman I owe my life to.”

Niall looked back and forth between us, confused.

"Lou almost killed him the night they met because he broke her sunglasses by accident. I stepped in and saved him," Kelsey explained.

Ni laughed and shook his head, “Typical.”

"Shut up, asshole," I laughed, punching him playfully. "Can we get over my social shortcomings and eat, please?"

….

The four of us were sitting at a booth, waiting for our food. Kelsey and I were talking about what neighborhoods she and Niall were looking for houses in and the boys were lost in boy world talking about boy crap. Zayn pulled his phone from his pocket, checked the screen, and furrowed his brow.

"Everything okay?" I asked him quietly.

"Uh, yeah. I just need to make a quick call. I’ll be right back," he said, giving me a swift kiss on the cheek and sliding out of the booth.

Kelsey and I went back to our conversation about house hunting, and Niall joined in. Zayn came running back to the table a few minutes later.

"Babe, I’m so sorry, I have to go, right now." He threw some money on the table and turned to Niall. "Can you guys take her home?"

"Uh, ye-" Ni started, but I cut him off.

"Wait a second. What’s going on?"

"I don’t have time to explain. I have to go."

"Yeah, well my car is at your place so I’m coming with you."

"Fine, let’s go," he said, grabbing my coat from the hook at the end of the booth.

"Sorry, guys. I’ll call you later," I said, taking off after Zayn.

"I’m eating your food!" Niall called after me.

I flipped him off behind my back and heard him laugh as I ran out the door.

"Zayn! Stop!"

He turned to me, pulling the passenger door of his car open for me, and running around the other side. “Baby, I can’t stop. We need to go. Please just get in the car.”

I jumped in and he took off, barely waiting for me to shut my door.

"Are you going to tell me what’s going on?"

"I can’t. I want to, but I just can’t right now. I’ll tell you when I figure it out."

"I will only accept that if you tell me that you’re okay.”

He took my hand and squeezed it, not taking his eyes off the road. “I don’t know yet.”


	10. Chapter 10

I woke up late Friday morning, still feeling like crap. I had been laid up in bed since Tuesday with a horrible sinus infection and bronchitis. I hadn’t seen Zayn since he dropped me off in his driveway Sunday afternoon, which was okay because I didn’t want to get him sick, but we had barely spoken either. He still hadn’t told me why he needed to leave lunch so abruptly, but kept promising that he would when he could. As much as I didn’t want to, I had to get myself together for Harry’s birthday party later. Zayn was going to pick me up at 8pm, so I still had a few hours to hit the mall and find a dress for the party.

I found the perfect dress and shoes at the third store I’d tried. The dress was midnight blue, and it was tight, short, and low-cut - just the way I like it - and I picked the least stripper-like silver pumps I could find.

After I left the mall, I had just enough time to stop by the salon so Kristen could do my hair before I had to get home and do my makeup.

"Hey, seester!" Kristen called to me as I walked through the door. "How are you feeling?"

"I’m gonna grin and bear it," I said, taking a seat at her station and pulling my hair out of its ponytail. "I’ve been on antibiotics for a few days and I spent, like, 48 straight hours in bed. This party is important to Harry, and Harry is important to Zayn, so I can suck it up for one night."

"Just don’t drink too much on those antibiotics," she said, starting to curl my hair.

"I know. Where is Zayn, by the way? I thought he would still be here, but I didn’t see his car out front."

"Your mom let him go home early, he said he had something special planned for you."

"What? Are you serious?" I asked, catching her eye in the mirror.

"Yeah," she laughed. "Personally, I’d like to see how he’s going to top a house full of flowers."

"So he didn’t tell you what it was?"

"No, but two big surprises in one week? Is he feeling guilty about something?" she asked in a sing-song voice.

I sighed. “I don’t know, Kiki. We went out to lunch with Kelsey and Niall on Sunday, and he had some big emergency before the food came, and had to leave. He still hasn’t told me why, but he said he will when he can. Kelsey thinks it’s a load of horseshit, and I should cut him loose, so that’s causing a bit of tension between us.”

"Well, I told you the day you met Zayn that he was in love with you. Just give him some time."

"Yeah, that wasn’t the day we met," I laughed.

"What?!"

"Long story," I said, still chuckling. "I don’t know if he loves me, but I think I trust him. I mean, I believe he will tell me when he’s ready to. I don’t think this one incident makes him untrustworthy.”

"Listen, he may not have said it to you, but I see him almost every day. You should see the way his eyes light up whenever your mom even mentions you in passing. Go with your gut on this one," she said, coating my hair with finishing spray.

I stood and hugged her, slipping a $20 into her apron. “Thanks, Kiki.”

….

I was finishing my lipstick when I heard the doorbell from downstairs. Shit, he’s early. I quickly removed the tags from my new dress and shoes, and was just slipping into the dress when my dad knocked on my bedroom door.

"Hey, come in. I need your help with my zipper," I called to him through the door.

"There’s a heavily tattooed boy in my house. Your mother said I had to let him in."

"Please be nice to him, Dad," I said, turning my back to him so he could zip me up.

"Give me one good reason," he said, holding his hand out for me so I could step into my heels.

"Because I’m heavily tattooed and you still love me. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I have to go yell at my inked prince for being early." I gave him a kiss on the cheek, and walked past him to the hallway.

"Don’t yell too much. He’s got red roses."

"Damn it! I told him to stop that. He’s been sending them all week!" I very carefully made my way downstairs, and found Zayn pacing back and forth across the front room. He stopped dead in his tracks when he saw me coming toward him.

"Wow," he whispered under his breath.

"Hi," I said, giggling. "I thought I told you to quit with the flowers, babe. I’m gonna have to open my own greenhouse soon." He smiled, placing the bouquet in my arms, and pulled me in for a kiss. "They’re beautiful, just like the rest. Thank you. Let me see if we have any vases left, and then we can go."

He followed me into the kitchen and talked with my parents while I searched the baker’s rack and cabinets for a large enough vase. After I found one and filled it with water, I dug a penny out of the change jar on the counter, and placed it in the vase with the roses. I crossed the kitchen to the family room, where Zayn and my mother were whispering rapidly.

"What are you two conspiring over?" I asked suspiciously.

Zayn whipped around. “Hey, babe. You ready to go?”

"Yeahhh…."

"Zayn, why don’t you take tomorrow off?" my mom suggested. I could have sworn I saw her wink at him.

"Mom, are you feeling okay?" I asked, putting my palm to her forehead.

"I’m fine," she laughed, swatting my hand away. "It’s his best friend’s birthday, I know you’ll be partying til all hours, and I’m honestly just trying to save myself from dealing with the headache of him being late in the morning."

"I’ll take it. Let’s go, babe," Zayn laughed, grabbing my hand. "Thank you," he added to my mom.

"Seriously," I said to him, taking my leather coat out of the front closet, "what is going on? There’s no way my mom just decided to give you the day off. She’s not-" He pulled the front door open and I completely lost my train of thought. "There’s a limo in front of my house."

"That there is," he said, clearly amused at my astonishment.

“Why is there a limo in front of my house?”

"It’s going to take us to the party," he said, gently guiding me through my stupor and down the driveway, "and later, it’s going to take us to the airport."

"Why?" I asked, climbing into the limo with him.

"Because we’re taking the red eye to Key West tonight."

"Are you fucking crazy?"

"I’m trying to apologize for last weekend," he laughed. "Besides, you’ve been sick, and there’s no better way to get better than drinks on the beach."

"That’s one hell of an apology, but I don’t have any stuff. You can’t just spring a vacation on me."

"Your mom packed you a bag earlier, and I added a few essentials. It’s in the trunk."

"I knew you two were planning something. You are fucking crazy.”

"So you forgive me?"

"I’ll forgive you when you tell me what happened on Sunday. I’ve been patient and understanding, but this is causing a rift between me and my best friend, so I need you to tell my why I’m compromising that relationship for this one."

"I can’t tell you everything, not without his permission."

"Who’s permission?" Oh my God, he’s a fucking mobster or something!

"Harry’s. There was a thing, a major thing, that happened a couple years ago, and it really fucked him up. He’s been battling some serious depression since then, and it got really bad on Sunday. Suicidal bad. Liam called me freaking out because Harry lost it after they dropped the flowers at your house. Liam didn’t know what to do with him, and needed my help to talk him down."

"Oh my God, Zayn," I said, taking his hand. "I’m so sorry. Is he okay? Are you?"

"He’s better. I’m hoping this party cheers him up, and doesn’t just make it worse. As for me, I don’t think I’ll be okay until I don’t spend every waking minute worrying about him."

….

The party was already in full swing when we pulled into Harry’s driveway and got out of the limo. “Jesus, do all of your friends live in mansions?”

"We’re all trust fund babies. It’s all we know," he chuckled.

"Seriously? I mean, obviously I knew you had money, not that I care, but damn!"

He laughed. “Yeah. All of our parents are jackass society types, and we decided when we were kids we didn’t want to be like that. We all slip every now and again, but we really keep each other grounded. The only thing we’ve allowed ourselves to be flashy with is property because it’s an investment. We all have our houses here, which you know, and I have the one in Key West, Liam has one in L.A., and Harry has one in London.”

"Way to make me feel inferior," I joked, elbowing him in the ribs.

"Do you want a house? I can buy you a house," he teased back, leading me through Harry’s front door.

We immediately spotted Liam, once again being the center of attention behind the bar.

"Hey, love birds," he said, coming toward us. "What are you drinking?"

"Beer for me. Babe?"

"Hmmm… it feels like a rum and Coke kind of night," I said, reaching over the bar to give Liam a hug.

He walked away to get our drinks, and Zayn wrapped himself around me from behind and kissed my neck. “Don’t bend over like that in this dress,” he whispered in my ear, and I felt his hard on against my back. “I’m gonna rip it off and have my way with you in front of all these people.”

"Can I have my drink first?" I whispered back, pushing my ass against him. He bit down on his lower lip and shook his head at me, but didn’t say anything because Liam had returned. "So where’s the birthday boy?" I asked Liam.

"I haven’t seen him in a little while. He’s around here somewhere."

"You were supposed to be keeping an eye on him until I got here, Liam. What the fuck?" Zayn whispered angrily.

Liam looked shocked at first, but then he was angry, too. “How much does she know?” he asked, gesturing at me.

"She knows enough. I had to tell her after Sunday. That’s not important now. Why weren’t you watching him?"

"He’s been fine all day!" Liam said, starting to raise his voice.

"That’s the point, Liam. He’s fine until he’s not. He could slip again, especially if he’s been drinking!" Zayn grabbed my arm and roughly pulled me from the room. We didn’t stop moving until we found a quiet corner on the other side of the house.

"Zayn, take a breath, babe," I said, stroking his cheek.

"Sorry," he said, pulling me in tight. "Liam just doesn’t get it sometimes."

"It’s okay," I said, leaning back so I could look into his eyes. "It’s okay. Let’s go find Harry."

"Just give me a minute."

I stood there and let him hold me until his breathing evened out and his hands stopped shaking. We found Harry on the deck near the hot tub with a group of bikini-clad girls throwing themselves at him.

"He certainly seems to be in his element."

"Not quite," Zayn said, waving to get Harry’s attention.

He excused himself from the girls and loped toward us. “Hey, you made it,” he said, hugging us in turn.

"Of course we did," I said. "Happy birthday!"

"What’s in the cup, Haz?"

"It’s water, man. I’m not drinking tonight. I smoked a little weed to chill me out, though."

Zayn laughed. “That’s fine, bud. Just take it easy.”

"You guys getting in?" Harry asked, motioning toward the hot tub.

"Lou?" Zayn looked at me hopefully.

"Oh no," I laughed as Zayn’s smile vanished. "I’m not wearing enough under this dress."

"Your bag is in the limo, remember? There are bathing suits in there, I made sure of it."

"Wouldn’t you rather save it for the beach?" I asked him seductively, slipping my arms around his neck. There was a loud crash and shouting from inside the house. I could see people rushing toward the front door. "What the hell?"

"Stay here," Zayn said, pushing me into Harry’s arms. But before Zayn reached the door, someone came out through it. Someone I didn’t recognize. He looked to be about our age, sandy brown hair, and light eyes that were full of sadness.

"I need to see him, Liam! Let me see him!" the boy was shouting as Liam came up behind him.

"Who is that?" I asked Harry.

"Louis!" Zayn yelled, and the boy turned toward him as Zayn’s fist collided with his jaw.

Everyone that had been on the deck ran into the house, leaving just the five of us outside. Louis was lying there bleeding, Zayn and Liam breathing hard. Harry and I were too shocked to move.

"Sorry, I tried to stop him at the door," Liam panted. "Mother fucker’s fast."

"Lou, baby, will you please go inside?" Zayn asked me.

"Absolutely not."

"Fine. Liam, take Harry and go make sure everyone’s gone. This party’s over."

Harry reluctantly let Liam lead him into the house. “Don’t hurt him, Zayn,” he said before shutting the door.

I stood back, watching Zayn.

"What the fuck are you doing here, Louis?"

Louis sat up and tried to staunch the blood coming from his lip with his t-shirt. “It’s his birthday.”

"I know that, you son of a bitch! Why the fuck are you here?"

"I needed to see him."

"Well, he doesn’t want to see you, so get fucked."

"Please, just let me talk to him. I still love him, man," Louis pleaded. He tried to stand up, but Zayn shoved him back onto the deck.

“You still love him? He tried to kill himself after what you did, you piece of shit!” Zayn wound up to hit him again, but I stepped between them.

"Zayn, don’t. Harry asked you not to."

"Thank you," Louis said, still laid out on the deck.

I turned to him. “I don’t know you, and I don’t know what you did, but I know you hurt Harry. So don’t thank me because I will find out what happened and I might not stop him next time.”

"You need to leave, Louis," Zayn said, wrapping his arms around me protectively. Louis stood and went for the door, but Zayn put an arm out to stop him. "You’re not going inside. Walk around the house. Liam’s already locked all the other doors and windows, so don’t even think of trying to come back in."

We watched Louis walk down the steps and around the side of the house before going inside ourselves. I went in search of Liam and Harry, leaving Zayn to make sure all the doors and windows really were secured. I found Harry lying on the couch in the den, crying, and Liam was pacing back and forth, clenching and unclenching his fists. “I got him, Li. Will you go help Zayn check the locks? And make sure his hand is okay, please.”

Liam nodded and disappeared into the hallway. I lifted Harry’s head from the couch and sat down, resting his head on my legs and running my fingers through his hair. “You don’t have to say anything, but you can if you want to.” He rolled over and wrapped his arms around my waist, crying into my lap. I sat and held him, rubbing his back, until Zayn and Liam returned.

Zayn walked behind the couch and leaned over me, taking Harry’s face in his hands. “I’m so sorry, Haz.”

"Not your fault," Harry said, blinking the tears from his eyes.

"I’m still sorry he ruined your party. What do you want us to do?"

"I just want to take a shower and go to bed," he said, sitting up.

"Liam’s gonna go with you, okay?" Zayn put his hands on my shoulders, and waited for Harry and Liam to go upstairs before speaking again. He bent and kissed the top of my head. "I’m so sorry, baby."

"Stop apologizing to everyone, Zayn. None of this was your fault."

"I know," he said, rolling over the back of the couch and landing in my lap, exactly as Harry had been. "I just really needed this to be a good night for him, and that asshole fucked it all up."

I relaxed back into the cushions and stroked the side of Zayn’s face until we heard the shower stop and Liam announced that he was putting Harry to bed.

"Babe, do you mind if we push our flight til the morning?"

"Not at all. We should stay here with Harry tonight."

"Alright, I have to make some phone calls then. Go on upstairs, third door on the right is the spare bedroom I usually stay in. I’ll grab our bags from the limo and meet you up there." He kissed me softly on the lips and went outside.

I found Liam at the top of the stairs, sitting outside Harry’s bedroom. “Hey, Zayn and I are gonna stay the night. Do you need anything?”

"I need a lot of things."

"You wanna narrow that down for me?" I asked, sliding to the floor next to him.

"I need Louis to stop being such a selfish bastard. I need Harry to be okay despite Louis’ bastardishness, and I need Zayn to forgive me."

"I’ll talk to Zayn."

"You still don’t know everything. If you did, you would know it’s going to take more than some pillow talk to make him forgive me."

"Forget I offered then," I said, getting up. Liam grabbed my hand to stop me.

"I’m sorry," he said, "this is just a lot for all of us. Louis showing up here was the worst thing that could have happened tonight. I’m sure Zayn’s beating himself up over it. I know I am."

"I said this to Zayn, and I’m saying it to you; this was not your fault. And you’re right, I don’t know the whole story, but I know that you three care about each other, and you’ll get Harry through this."

"You ready for bed?" Zayn asked, coming up the stairs behind us, dropping our bags at my feet.

"Yeah." I grabbed my bag and kissed him on the cheek. "Talk to him," I whispered in his ear.

I took my shoes off, dropping them and my bag next to our bedroom door, and went to the bathroom to wash my face. I could hear Zayn and Liam whispering angrily in the hallway, but when I emerged, Zayn was sitting at the end of the bed, waiting for me. He wrapped his arms around my thighs, and rested his head on my stomach, so I stood there playing with his hair until I felt the tension start to leave his shoulders.

"I know you want to know what happened, but I’m so tired. I promise I’ll tell you on the plane tomorrow."

"Are you sure you still want to go?"

"Yeah, it’s only for a couple of days. I called Harry’s sister and she’ll be here in the morning. She can only stay for a few hours, but Liam promised he would take care of Harry until we get back."

"Good. How’s your hand?"

"It feels like it ran into a prick’s face."

I laughed. “Let me get you some ice, champ.”

I went down to the kitchen and found a plastic sandwich bag to fill with ice. When I returned to the bedroom, Zayn was passed out on his back, still fully clothed. I took his shoes off, and curled up on his right side, gently placing the ice on his swollen knuckles.

….

I woke the next morning alone. My bag was gone, but Zayn had laid out a camisole and jeans for me with a pair of flats. I changed, put my hair up, and went downstairs in search of the boys. Liam was leaning over the kitchen counter, yawning into a mug of coffee.

"Got one of those for me?" He nodded, grabbing a fresh mug from one of the cabinets and filling it for me. "Thanks. Where are Harry and Zayn?"

"Harry’s still sleeping. Zayn didn’t want to wake you, but he went to get us breakfast and pick up some prescriptions for Harry. He was on the phone really late last night with Harry’s psychiatrist convincing him to call something in to the pharmacy. He should be back any minute."

"Did you sleep at all?"

"Barely. Zayn and I switched off watching Harry for hours, and I’m pretty sure when he wasn’t watching Harry, he was just watching you."

"Go get some rest, Liam," I said, giving him a sad smile. "I’ll sit with Harry." I followed him up the stairs, and we went our separate ways at the top. I very quietly opened Harry’s bedroom door, and went to sit in the chair by his bed.

"Will you lay with me?"

I nearly jumped out of my skin. “Harry, you scared me! I thought you were asleep.”

"I haven’t slept all night. I was just pretending so Liam and Zayn wouldn’t worry more than they already were. But I felt really comfortable when you were running your fingers through my hair last night. Do you mind?"

"No. No, of course not," I said, climbing into the bed, and letting Harry wrap his skinny frame around me. I held him and stroked his curls until Zayn came through the door 20 minutes later.

"Hey, sorry for sneaking out on you this morning," he said, leaning down to kiss me. "How is he?"

"He just fell asleep."

"Alright, his sister will be here in 10 minutes, and we’ve got just under an hour to get to the airport. Is Liam sleeping?"

"Probably. I made him go lie down about half an hour ago."

"Shit."

"It’s fine, we can wait ten more minutes."

"Yeah. Yeah, okay, I’ll go wait for Gemma downstairs. You okay here?"

I nodded and smiled up at him. “Kiss me,” I said, intertwining my fingers with his. He gently pressed his lips to mine, and whispered a barely audible ‘thank you’ against them, before we heard the front door close.

"Gemma’s here. I’ll be right back." He exited the room, but left the door open so I could hear his conversation with Harry’s sister. "Hey, Gem."

"Hey," she said. "How is he?"

"He’s okay right now, sleeping. He’s upstairs with Lou."

"WHAT?!" she screamed. "What is wrong with you?"

I heard them running up the stairs. “Gemma, wait!” Zayn shouted after her. She burst through the door, and looked at me confused. “Gemma, my girlfriend, Lou. Not Louis.”

"I see that now," she said. "Sorry."

"It’s fine. Sorry to rush this, but we’ve got to get out of here. His meds are in the kitchen. He should take them as soon as he wakes up. Lou, let’s go."

I slipped very carefully from the bed, gently setting Harry’s head on the pillows. Gemma grabbed my arm as I was walking past her.

"Thank you both for taking care of him. I’m sorry we had to meet this way."

"Me too," I whispered.

"Liam’s asleep," Zayn said. "He was up all night, so try and let him sleep until you have to leave. I’ll call you when we land."

"Okay, thanks, Zayn," she said, hugging him.

….

Just over an hour later, we were wheels up on our way to Key West. We had made it to the airport with minutes to spare, racing through security, and running to our terminal. Zayn had fallen asleep almost immediately after take-off, so I sat back, holding his hand, and combing over the events of the night before in my mind. Now all of Zayn’s subtle hints about Harry not being interested in “what I had to offer,” and not being into the girls throwing themselves at him made complete sense. I really wanted to know the whole story about what happened between him and Louis, but I fought myself to be patient enough for Zayn to wake up.

….

He slept for the entire flight, and called Gemma the minute we touched down.

"How is he?" I asked the second he disconnected.

"Better. One of us will probably have to stay with him for the next few days just to make sure he doesn’t relapse, and we’ll have to deal with Louis at some point. Make sure he doesn’t just show up like that again."

"Right. About that," I said, waiting for him to continue.

"Let’s get to the car. I’ll tell you there."

We made our way to the luggage claim, and met Zayn’s driver outside. After we got settled in the back of the town car, Zayn took both of my hands in his, and took a deep breath.

"Okay. So you’ve obviously figured out that Louis and Harry were together."

"I had an idea."

"They got together our junior year of high school. Liam and I weren’t really all that surprised, even though neither of them had ever told us they were gay before then. They asked us to keep it a secret. They didn’t want their families to know. Things were fine at first, but Louis started getting crazy jealous over the most inconsequential things. Like if Harry and Liam hung out alone, he would freak out. If Harry gave me a hug, Louis wouldn’t talk to him for hours. After a while Harry became really withdrawn. I know Louis was emotionally abusive, and I suspect he may have been physically abusive, but other than the one time, I don’t have any proof. Harry would never admit it anyway."

"So when did they break up?"

"Right after Harry’s 21st birthday, almost 2 years ago. They’d gone away for the weekend, and when they came back, Harry proposed. Louis went nuts. He called Harry every name in the book, beat the crap out of him, and took off. I guess he thought that if they got married it couldn’t be a secret anymore, and he wasn’t ready for that. Gemma found Harry bleeding on the kitchen floor when she got home a few hours later, so we had to tell her. Harry became severely depressed and attempted suicide a few weeks later. None of us had heard from Louis since then. Until last night."

"And the reason you’re so upset with Liam?"

"I don’t talk to anyone about that."

"Oh. Okay," I said, clearly hurt.

"No. I mean, that’s how much I trust you. I don’t talk about it. Ever. But I want to tell you."

"You’re not gonna scare me off, Zayn."

"I know," he said, taking another deep breath before continuing. "My dad committed suicide when I was 15. We’d had a stupid fight the night before, and I’ve never really forgiven myself. I’ve been through therapy, I know it wasn’t my fault, but it still haunts me. I can’t help it. That’s why I said Liam doesn’t understand. I know he’s trying, but he’ll never really get it, and I hope he doesn’t."

Anything I could have said at that point would have just sounded like meaningless words, so I didn’t say anything. I undid my seat belt, and climbed into his lap, wrapping my arms around his neck. We stayed like that, silent, until the car pulled up to the house.

Everything inside was chrome and glass, and the view overlooking the beach was incredible.

"Oh my God, Zayn. This is the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen," I said, looking out over the balcony.

"I don’t know. The view I’ve got right now is pretty good."

I turned to see where he was looking, and realized he had been staring at me. “That was the corniest line I’ve ever heard,” I laughed.

He put his hand to his chest and gasped dramatically, “I am deeply offended,” he said, sarcastically. “I’ll have to punish you now.”

"Oh, yeah?" I questioned him, raising my eyebrows, still laughing.

"Oh, yeah," he said, suddenly very serious.

"Shit!" I took off with him chasing me.

By the time he caught up with me in the master bedroom, we were both out of breath, laughing hysterically. He tackled me onto the bed and climbed on top of me, pinning me on my back.

"You really are the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen."

"Zayn, " I said, rolling my eyes.

"Don’t roll you eyes at me, I’m serious. I know it hasn’t even been 2 weeks, but I’ve never felt like this with anyone else. You’re amazing."

"I can’t believe I’m saying this, but I feel the same way."

He pulled my camisole down around my waist, and threw my jeans and panties to the floor. He placed light kisses and gentle bites all over my body, starting at my ankles and working his way up to my mouth. I stopped him long enough to take his shirt off and undo his pants. Zayn wrapped me in his arms, and kissed me passionately, lining his length up with my entrance.

"Promise me you won’t hurt me like everyone I’ve ever let myself go with before," I said, looking him in the eye.

"I couldn’t," he swore, slowly sliding himself into me.


	11. Chapter 11

Zayn and I never made it to the beach. We spent the entire weekend making love all over the house; in the bedroom, the shower, on the kitchen floor, the couch, the balcony. I’d never used the phrase “making love” before then. It had always sounded so cheesy and lame, but that was the only way to describe what we were doing. It wasn’t “fucking.” It was beautiful and tender and I had never experienced anything like it with anyone else. We couldn’t get close enough; it was like our souls were trying to consume each other. I don’t know if it was our chemistry, or the fact that he had shared more with me that weekend than he’d ever shared with anyone before, but it was incredible, and I wasn’t ready for it to be over.

We were laying in bed Sunday night, naked and still wrapped around each other.

"Do we have to go back tomorrow?" I asked.

"No. We can stay here forever."

"Don’t say that. I just might take you up on it." I sighed deeply, and the weight of the whole week hit me all at once.

"Are you crying?"

"No," I lied.

"Yes, you are. What’s wrong?"

"I don’t know. I’m worried about Harry, and I need to sort things out with Kelsey. I hate it when we argue, and I haven’t talked to her since Wednesday. And I really, really don’t want to leave this bed, and go back to reality."

"What did you say to me Friday night when you knew I was furious with Liam?"

"Talk to him."

"Exactly. Take your own advice, babe. Once you tell her what happened, I’m sure she’ll understand."

"You’re okay with me telling her?"

"If you trust her, then I trust her."

"Alright, I’ll call her when we get home."

"Good. Can I go back to distracting you from all of that now?"

I giggled, wiping the tears from my eyes. “If you insist.”

He tucked his bottom lip behind his teeth, and pulled me on top of him. With his elbows pressed into the mattress, Zayn put his palms up, and I rested my hands on his to balance myself.

"Tell me your ultimate fantasy," he said, grinding his hips beneath me.

"No judgement?"

"I wouldn’t have asked if I didn’t want to know."

"Fair enough. Threesome."

"Really?" he asked, entering me roughly. "Got someone in mind for us?"

"Well, I would have said Harry before I found out he was gay."

"Wait, a Devil’s threesome? Are you serious?"

"You said you wouldn’t judge me!"

"Oh, baby, I’m not judging. That is so hot," he said, flipping us over, so he was on top. "Like DP and everything?"

I laughed, “I could probably be persuaded to give it a shot.”

"You say the word, I’ll make it happen," he said, gently biting my shoulder.

….

Monday evening, Kelsey and I were sitting in my family room with a bottle of wine. I had called her as soon as Zayn dropped me off at home that morning, and she had agreed to meet me after work.

"I don’t want us to fight, Kelsey," I said, filling her glass.

"Me either. I just don’t want to see you get hurt again. You’re a big girl, you can make your own decisions, but I want you to be careful with Zayn."

"I am being careful. I trust him, and I want you to trust him, too. So does he, which is why he’s okay with me telling you what really happened last weekend." I told her everything about Harry and Louis, their relationship, and what happened at the party Friday night. I only left out Zayn’s dad’s suicide; that wasn’t something she needed to know.

"Sounds like you’ve had a rough week."

"I don’t want you to worry about me, Kels. Zayn is a good man. Admittedly, a little difficult to get to know, but good."

"Shut up. I’m always going to worry about you. I hope I’m wrong about Zayn, though. I really do."

….

"So do you want to go to London or L.A. for our 2nd monthiversary?"

"Sorry. What?" I snapped back to attention. Zayn and I were laying on the couch in his living room, and I had drifted off. I had been completely unfocused for the last couple weeks.

"You still feeling sick, babe?" he asked, rubbing my back.

"Yeah. I’ve been throwing up for days, but otherwise I feel fine."

"Well, you better kick this bug by next weekend. L.A. or London? Liam and Harry have both offered their houses to us."

"That’s so sweet of them, but it’ll have to be L.A. I don’t have a passport."

"Are you serious?" he asked, sitting up.

"Yeah, I’ve never been anywhere that required one."

"You’re applying for one first thing in the morning. I’m taking you to Europe for the summer."

"You’re insane. I can’t just take a bunch of time off work to go bumming around Europe with my boyfriend."

"Why not?"

"Because I have bills to pay."

"Move in with me."

"Oh my God, you’re crazy," I said, getting off the couch, and going to the fridge.

"Why am I crazy? You’re always harping on Kelsey about how long it’s taken for her and Niall to move in together."

"That’s because they’ve been together for 11 years. You and I haven’t even been together for 11 weeks. Don’t you have any chocolate in this house?" I asked, slamming cupboards.

"Probably not."

"Well, there you go. I can’t live with you because you don’t have chocolate."

"Babe, what’s wrong?" he asked, coming up behind me and massaging my shoulders.

"I don’t know," I said, turning around and burying my face in his chest. "I feel like crap, and you’re just standing here being all perfect. Can you just be a really shitty boyfriend for a while? It’ll make me feel better."

"Sure, baby," he laughed, kissing the top of my head.

"Thank you."

"You wanna make me a sandwich?"

I looked up at him, and put my hands on his chest. “Is that you being a shitty boyfriend?”

"Yeah. How was it?"

"Terrible," I laughed, standing on my tiptoes for a kiss.

"I’m gonna go call Liam, let him know we’re using the house."

"Okay. Don’t forget, we can’t leave until Saturday morning. Kelsey and Niall get the keys Thursday and I’ll be there painting from then until Friday night."

"How about we leave late Friday night?"

"Don’t look at me with those puppy dog eyes."

"Please," he pouted.

"Oh my God. Fine, but you’re explaining that one to Kelsey if we’re not finished," I laughed.

Zayn left the kitchen to call Liam, and suddenly another nasty wave of nausea hit me. I ran to the bathroom, making it to the toilet just in time to throw up. Twice. I was splashing cold water on my face, my hands shaking, when Zayn found me.

"Maybe you should call your doctor, babe."

"I’m fine. Whatever it is, you haven’t caught it, and we’ve been together almost every day. It’ll pass."

"Will you go if you’re not feeling better by the time we get back from L.A.?"

"Fine," I agreed. "Can we go to bed now? I’m exhausted."

"Brush your teeth first. I’m not kissing your puke mouth."

"You’re getting better at that shitty boyfriend thing," I laughed, following him up the stairs.

….

I suffered through the next two days at work, but was feeling much better when I pulled up in front of Kelsey and Niall’s new house Thursday afternoon.

"I brought champagne!" I shouted, greeting Niall at the door.

"Thank God! My roommate’s a nightmare," he said, standing back to let me in.

"I heard that!" Kelsey called from the next room.

"Oh my God, you guys! This place is so cute! When’s the party?"

"That would be the first thing on your mind,” Niall said, taking the champagne from me.

"Said the most Irish person I’ve ever met. You love having a reason to drink more than I do," I retorted, following him into the kitchen.

"Children," Kelsey chided, stepping down from the ladder she had been using to apply painter’s tape along the ceiling. "Don’t make me separate you."

"Yes, mom," I said, hugging her.

We both looked at Niall when he didn’t say anything.

"What?" he mumbled around the handful of chips in his mouth. "I’m not calling you ‘mom.’ It’ll be too weird when I’m fucking you later."

"Niall!" Kelsey shrieked, turning red, but neither of us could hold back our laughter.

"Okay," I said, wiping the tears from my cheeks once our giggles had subsided. "Let’s pop the champagne!"

"We haven’t moved any boxes in yet," Kelsey said, wiping her own face. "No glasses."

"I came prepared," I said, pulling three plastic cups from my purse.

"You would," Niall teased, popping the cork. He poured some into each of our cups, and we raised them in a toast.

"To owning your first home together. Congratulations!" We "clinked" our cups and swallowed the champagne, but I nearly spit mine back out. "Does it taste off to you guys?"

"No," Niall said, filling his cup again.

"No, you okay?" Kelsey asked.

"Yeah, I’ve had this stomach thing for a few days. Must be that."

….

I went home to pack my bags for the weekend after we’d finished priming the walls.

"Hey, stranger," my mom said when I came through the front door.

"Hi," I smiled. "Sorry, I know I haven’t been home in a few days."

"I almost forgot what you look like," she said, patting the seat next to her on the couch.

I flopped down beside her. “If I put my suitcase in your car, can you make sure Zayn gets it at work tomorrow? He wants to come straight to Kelsey and Niall’s from the salon, and pick me up there.”

"If you take me with you," she teased.

"Next time," I said, getting up.

"I’m holding you to that!" she called as I headed up the stairs.

….

I wasn’t much help at Kelsey and Niall’s Friday morning; the paint fumes were making me sick.

"Are you sure you should be going on vacation like this?" Kelsey asked when I came back to the master bedroom after running off to throw up for the third time.

"I’m fine. It’s just a bug. I promised Zayn I’d go to the doctor if it’s not gone when we get home."

"You better. We wanna have our housewarming party next Saturday."

"Babe, will you go grab me a beer?" Niall asked, interrupting us.

"Go get your own beer," she laughed.

"Please," he begged. "I’d have to get off this ladder, you’re already on the ground."

"Fine," she caved, swiping her wet brush down his arm before leaving the room.

"Hey!" Niall whispered as soon as Kelsey was out of ear shot.

"Why are you whispering?"

"Shhh!! Can you keep a secret?"

"Has Kelsey ever found out about the time I caught you jacking off while we were camping when we were 16?"

"Fair point. I want to propose at the party. Can you come pick out a ring with me when you get home on Monday?"

Kelsey was coming back, so I nodded quickly, giving him a mega watt smile.

….

The doorbell rang just after 5 o’clock.

"Niall, that’s probably Zayn. Can you get it?" I called down the stairs.

Kelsey and I were in the upstairs bathroom talking while I got cleaned up and changed. I had thrown up again, and was brushing my teeth. Again.

"I’m just gonna ask one more time. Are you sure about this vacation?"

"I’m fine, Kelsey," I mumbled, spitting out toothpaste.

"Okay. I’m letting it go."

"Thank you. How do I look?"

"Like you’ve been throwing up all day."

"Nice," I laughed, leading the way downstairs. I could hear Niall and Zayn talking in the kitchen.

"Lou, this one’s a keeper. He brought beer and pizza," Niall said.

"Thanks, babe. You didn’t have to do that."

"Well, new house. I figured they hadn’t been grocery shopping yet."

"You figured right, man. Thank you," Niall said, handing Zayn a beer.

Zayn slipped an arm around my waist. “The place looks great, guys. Sorry I’m taking your little helper away. Do you want me to send Liam and Harry over to haul boxes tomorrow?”

"No, that’s okay," Kelsey said, accepting a slice of pizza from Niall. "Niall’s brother is in town, and I’m bringing my little brother with me in the morning."

"You didn’t tell me Greg was in town," I said, trying to act casual.

"Seriously, Lou? Still?" Kelsey laughed.

"Shut up," I threatened.

"Still what?" Zayn asked.

"Lou here has had a crush on my big brother, Greg, since we were kids. It’s adorable," Niall explained, pinching my cheek.

"Dick," I muttered, swatting his hand away. "I do not have a crush."

"What would you call it?"

"He’s just - he’s a nice guy." Kelsey and Niall erupted in a fit of laughter. "Fuck you both."

After they calmed down - and I stopped blushing - we sat on the kitchen floor with the beer and pizza. The three of them were eating and drinking, but I couldn’t stand the smell of the beer, and the thought of pizza made stomach turn.

"You gonna eat, babe?"

I shook my head ‘no,’ and leaned back against Zayn’s chest. Kelsey gave me her best mom face, so I stuck my tongue out at her, and nibbled on Zayn’s crusts.

….

"So should I be worried about this Greg character?" Zayn teased me when we were sitting in the airport terminal.

"Oh my God, shut up," I laughed.

"Is he more handsome than me? Better hair? Prettier eyes? Sculpted body?"

"Seriously, shut up," I said, barely breathing because I was laughing so hard.

"What is it then?"

"He was my first crush. You know, that whole unrequited love thing. We were kids."

"Nothing more than that?"

"Okay, not even Kels and Niall know this, but I guess you have the right to. Greg and I hooked up once. It was a long time ago. He was home from college for the weekend, we had a few drinks, it just kind of happened. We swore we’d never tell Niall, and we never spoke of it again."

"So am I gonna have to fight him for you when I meet him?"

"Definitely not."

"Good. I would though."

"Thanks, babe," I said, smiling at him.

….

Our flight was delayed 2 hours, so it was almost 3am by the time we landed in Los Angeles. We went straight to bed once we arrived at Liam’s.

I woke Saturday morning to a cacophony of cooking sounds and a lovely smell wafting from the kitchen. I threw on one of Zayn’s t-shirts, and left the bedroom to find Zayn slaving away over the stove.

"Morning, baby," he said with a mouth full of toast, handing me a cup of coffee.

"I swear, I’m the luckiest girl in the world."

"Why’s that?"

"Because I’ve somehow landed a gorgeous, sickeningly wealthy guy who loves to cook for me, and knows not to expect anything out of me before my first cup of coffee."

"Wow, he sounds great. Who is he?"

I laughed, wrapping my arms around his neck, and kissed him deeply. “Don’t burn my eggs, funny guy.”

"I thought we could spend today on the beach since we never stepped foot outside when we were in Key West."

"Or we could have a repeat of Key West."

Zayn quickly shut off the stove, threw his spatula on the counter, and playfully tackled me to the kitchen floor. “You’re feeling better, then?” he asked, tracing light circles on my sides under the t-shirt.

"Mmmhmm," I managed, as he worked his way to my breasts.

"When was the last time you threw up?"

I laughed, “Oh, yeah, baby, keep up that dirty talk. It makes me so hot.”

"Sorry, let me try again." He kissed my jaw, and pinched my left nipple.

"OW! Gentle, babe."

"I barely touched you."

"God, that really fucking hurt."

"Do you want me to stop?"

"No, they’re probably just sensitive because my period is due next week."

"And now I’m turned off."

"Sorry," I said, cracking up. "You wanna finish making me breakfast then?"

"Yep," he laughed, helping me off the floor.

….

After breakfast, we put our bathing suits on and walked down to the private beach. We rubbed each other down with sun block, and laid our towels side-by-side in the sand.

"I know I said this in Key West, but I seriously do not want to go home. This is so beautiful."

"I can probably convince Liam to sell me the house. Or I can find us a house in the area."

"Oh my God, stop trying to buy me a house," I laughed.

"I just want you to have nice things," he said, taking my hand.

"I don’t need nice things," I said, giving his hand a squeeze. "This is enough. Join me for a swim?"

"I don’t swim."

"What?"

"I don’t know how."

"I’ll let you take me to Europe this summer if you let me teach you how to swim."

"And buy you a house?"

"One extravagance at a time," I said, pulling him toward the water.

We spent the next hour or so laughing and splashing around in the ocean. He was a quick learner, but I could tell he didn’t like it.

"Wanna go back to the house and fool around?" he asked, wiggling his eyebrows at me, and picking me up.

I wrapped my legs around his waist, and ran my fingers through his wet hair, looking into his liquid honey eyes. “You always say the sweetest things.”

"Just trying to keep the spark alive, baby," he laughed, leaning in to kiss me.

….

I sneaked out of bed in the middle of the night to get a glass of water. I’d been having really bad cramps for a few hours, but hadn’t told Zayn because I didn’t want him to worry, so I went to the bathroom to look for pain meds. I found a bottle of Tylenol in one of the cabinets, and swallowed three down with my water. As soon as I set my glass back on the counter, I was hit with the worst cramp yet. My knees buckled, and I fell to the floor, knocking the glass over on my way down. It shattered into a million pieces on the tile floor, and that’s when I noticed all the blood pouring down the insides of my thighs.

"ZAYN!!!" I heard him come running immediately. "Careful, there’s glass everywhere," I said when he appeared in the doorway, and I saw the color drain from his face.

"Oh, God! Are you okay? What happened? Did you get cut?"

"It’s not from the glass. I need to go to the hospital. Now. Something’s wrong."

The last thing I remember before I blacked out was Zayn telling me everything was going to be okay.


	12. Chapter 12

I woke up in the hospital.

"Hey! Someone! She's waking up, someone get in here!" I could hear Zayn yelling before I'd fully opened my eyes.

"Babe, stop shouting," I whispered. My voice was weak and shaky. "What happened?"

"Oh, thank God," he said, kissing me. "You fainted. They won't tell me anything else. I had to fight to even be in here."

"Lauren, I'm Dr. Brookside," an older man said, coming into the room.

"It's Lou," Zayn and I said at the same time. He took my hand, and kissed my knuckles while the doctor checked my vitals.

"Looking much better. Mr. Malik, maybe you can step outside while Lou and I talk."

"Yeah, that's not gonna happen," Zayn said. The doctor looked at me for approval.

"He's not going anywhere."

"Okay," Dr. Brookside said, taking a seat. "Can you tell me what you remember?"

"I remember having really bad cramps. Then there was a lot of blood, and I woke up here."

"I'm sorry. You lost the baby."

"What are you talking about? I'm not pregnant."

"You were about 6 weeks along from the looks of things."

"That's not possible. I'm on the pill. I never miss a day."

"The pill is not 100% effective. Do you use other forms of birth control?"

"No...Oh, my God. 6 weeks ago we were in Key West. All we did that weekend was have sex," I said, breathless.

"Yeah..." Zayn looked at me confused.

"I was on antibiotics," I said, starting to cry. The doctor gave me a sad, understanding smile.

"What does that matter?" Zayn asked, looking back and forth between me and the doctor.

"Antibiotics counteract birth control pills," Dr. Brookside explained, "making them virtually ineffective."

"I'm so sorry, Zayn."

"It's okay, baby," he said, kissing the top of my head. "So, she had a miscarriage? Was it the flight? I tackled her in the kitchen yesterday. Did I - did I cause this?" There were tears forming in his eyes, too.

"It could have been any number or combination of things, this isn't anyone's fault. There's no medical proof that flying or continuing to take birth control pills in the first trimester causes miscarriage, but we can't be sure. There's just no way to tell."

"Okay," I took a deep breath, and held tight to Zayn's hand. "What happens now?"

"I've got you scheduled for an emergency D & C, but I want you to follow up with your regular OB/GYN when you get home. You can leave the hospital shortly after the procedure, but I don't want you flying for at least 3 days, just to be safe. We'll get you to the procedure room within the hour," he said, getting up and leaving the room.

Zayn climbed into the bed with me and held me against his chest while I cried.

"I'm supposed to go shopping for engagement rings with Niall tomorrow."

"He's proposing?"

"On Saturday. Can you call him? Don't tell him what happened. He'll tell Kelsey, and she'll call my mom. I can't deal with that right now."

"What do you want me to say?"

"I don't know. Make something up."

"I'm sorry, Lou."

"You heard the doctor. It's no one's fault. Anyway, it's kind of a blessing, right? We haven't been together anywhere near long enough to have a baby."

"Right," he choked out, crying in earnest now.

There was a knock at the door, and a nurse came in. "I'm going to take you up to the procedure room now. Mr. Malik, I'm sorry, but you'll have to wait here. She'll be back in less than an hour."

"Okay," he said, clambering off the bed, and kissing me. "I'll call and get our flight pushed to Thursday, and I'll talk to Niall."

I nodded and let the nurse wheel me out of the room.

....

By Sunday afternoon, Zayn and I were back at Liam's beach house. All I had been wearing when I passed out was one of Zayn's t-shirts and my underwear, both of which had been ruined by all the blood, so the hospital had given me some sweats that I couldn't wait to get out of. Zayn quickly cleaned the glass and my blood off the bathroom floor before he drew me a bath, and sat on the edge of the tub, holding my hand, while I soaked.

"Niall's pretty upset. Said he knew I wasn't telling him everything," Zayn said, stroking the back of my hand with his thumb.

"He'll get over it."

"I think you should call him. I called your work to let them know you won't be in this week , and I rearranged our flight plans, but you should speak to Niall."

"I don't want to deal with any of that now."

"Okay, well, you should call your parents at least. Let them know we're staying."

"I said I don't want to right now," I said, beginning to shout. "Can you just get out?"

He looked at me like I'd slapped him, dropping my hand, and left the bathroom without a word. I cried quietly in the tub until the water went cold. When I got out, I found Zayn on the couch, his eyes red and puffy. We sat next to each other in complete silence for hours, until I got up and headed for the bedroom.

"Am I allowed to come with you, or should I sleep on the couch?" he asked, his voice breaking.

"Do whatever you want, Zayn."

I laid in bed alone for a few minutes before I saw his shadow in the doorway. I quickly shut my eyes, pretending to be asleep, and felt him settle onto the bed next to me.

He gently tucked my hair behind my ear and whispered, "I would have been honored to have a baby with you."

It took all my strength not to burst into tears all over again.

....

We spent the next 3 days at the beach house. Barely speaking. Barely in the same room. I didn't know what to say to him, so saying nothing just seemed easier.

I called Niall when we landed at home on Thursday.

"What the hell is going on?" he asked by way of answering the phone.

"Sorry. I'll be home in a couple hours. I'll explain everything, and we can go ring shopping."

"I picked one out already, but I wasn't sure about the size, which you would know if you hadn't shut your fucking phone off. I do want your opinion, though."

"Well, my car's still at your house, so I'll have Zayn drop me there obviously. Do you want to go straight to the mall, or is it cool if I run home first?"

"I'd like to get this taken care of before Kelsey gets home from work."

"Right," I sighed. "See you in a little while, then."

....

When we got to Kelsey and Niall's, Zayn got out to put my bags in my car for me.

"Thanks," I said, closing the trunk, and turning to walk away from him.

"Lou." He grabbed my wrist, and turned me to face him. "What now? Where do we go from here?"

"What do you mean?"

"I mean you've hardly said two words to me since Sunday. Are we - "

"Are we what, Zayn?"

"Are you breaking up with me?"

I had never seen someone look so hurt before, and silent tears started falling from my eyes again. "I don't know. I just need a few days to sort this out, okay?" I pulled my hand away from him, and turned to see Niall waiting for me on the porch.

"Everything okay out here?"

"We're fine, Ni," I said, wiping my face and coming toward him. "I'll talk to you later, Zayn."

He gave me a weak smile, got back in his car, and drove away.

"I'll follow you to your house so you can drop your car off, and then you're gonna spill," Niall said, getting into his own car.

....

I parked in my driveway, and quickly ran around the passenger side of Niall's car, bundled up against the chilly April breeze.

"Start talking," he said, putting the car in reverse.

"You have to promise not to tell Kelsey any of this until after the party. As far as she knows, Zayn and I were enjoying ourselves, and wanted to spend a few more days together."

"I promise. Now tell me the truth, because what I saw in my front yard 20 minutes ago was not a happy couple."

"Okay, so you remember how I had been throwing up for days before Zayn and I left?" He nodded for me to continue. "Turns out it wasn't a stomach bug, it was morning sickness."

"What the fuck?!? You're pregnant?"

"No," I said, holding back my tears. "I lost the baby early Sunday morning. The doctor didn't want me to fly, that's why we had to stay."

Niall suddenly pulled over and got out of the car.

"Ni, what are you doing?"

"Shut up," he said, walking around the car and opening my door. "Get out."

"Niall, what the hell?"

"Get. Out."

Confused, I did as he asked. "This is - "

He pulled me into a tight hug, silencing me. "I'm so sorry, Lou."

We stood on the side of the road, hugging, until I stopped crying.

....

We got to the jeweler's, and the sales associate brought out the ring Niall had picked earlier in the week.

"Whoa! Ni, this is perfect! Exactly what she would have picked for herself." I quickly snapped a picture on my phone.

"What are you doing?" he asked, panicky.

"Chill, dude. So I can show my mom."

"Right, sorry. What size, do you think?"

"Her and I are about the same. A 6 should be a perfect fit for her."

"Will you try it on?"

"Yeah, but it'll probably be tight on me." His hands shook as he slid the ring onto my finger. "Jesus, Niall. It's not like it's the real thing, calm down."

"I know, but I'm still nervous as hell."

"Why? You know she's going to say yes. She's been ready to say yes since we were 15."

"Exactly! I know how you girls are. She's probably had this moment all built up in her head for years, and if I don't get it right, she'll say yes just to torture me for the rest of our natural lives."

I swear, I really, really tried not to laugh, because I knew he was vulnerable and freaking out, but in the end it was too much, and I was laughing hysterically. "I'm sorry, I'm sorry," I howled, wiping tears from my eyes.

"You're evil, you know that?"

"I know, I'm sorry," I said, gathering myself. "Really, Niall, the proposal isn't what matters. You know she loves you, and she isn't going to care what you say, just that you're finally saying it."

"Sounds like you're waiting for someone to say something to you."

"Don't try to be insightful. You're shit at it."

Niall laughed, "I'll take that as a yes."

"Just pay for the ring, Niall," I said, wiggling it off my finger, and setting it back on the counter.

He handed his credit card to the sales woman, and turned to me with his serious face. "Don't freeze Zayn out over this. He's the only guy you've dated that actually cares about you. And the only one I've ever liked."

"So this is about you?" I teased.

"Of course," he laughed, elbowing me. "Seriously though, you know none of what happened was on purpose. He lost the baby, too."

....

Saturday afternoon I went over to Kelsey and Niall's to help them set up. I had been dodging Zayn's calls for two days. He wanted to know if he should still come to the party, and I wasn't sure if I wanted to see him yet.

"Hey," Kelsey greeted me at the door. "Where's Zayn?"

"He's working."

"Oh. Is he coming over straight after?"

"I'm not sure."

"What happened?"

"Nothing happened, I just don't know what his exact plans are."

"You're lying, but we have too much to do for me to stand here figuring out why."

"Great. Where's Niall?"

"He went to get ice. Come help me hang the lights on the deck before it gets dark."

We spent the next 45 minutes putting up tiki torches and paper lamps. Niall came out back just as we were finishing.

"Looks great, ladies! Babe, will you go make me a sandwich or something?"

"I don't have time to make you a sandwich."

"C'mon," he begged, putting his hands on her hips. "I'm not allowed to touch anything in the fridge, and I wouldn't want to make a mess in the kitchen after you cleaned it up so nice."

"Niall James Horan, you are a weasel," Kelsey laughed. "You want anything, Lou?"

"I'm okay," I said as Kelsey went inside, leaving Niall and I alone on the deck. "Look at you, already being a jackass husband, and you haven't even popped the question yet."

"I know, I'm good," he laughed. "I need to talk to you about something."

"Okay..."

"Zayn has been calling me all day."

"You weren't out getting ice just now, were you?"

"I got the ice 2 days ago."

"You bastard! You met up with him."

"I'm sorry, he said you weren't returning his calls."

"So what did he want?"

"He wanted to know if he was still welcome here tonight."

"And?"

"And I told him he should come."

"I could kill you right now," I said, trying not to yell.

"Well, I think you'll be thanking me later."

"I'm certainly not going to now," I hissed, storming in the house.

....

We finished decorating with just enough time for Kelsey and I to run upstairs and get ready.

"So are you going to tell me why you're mad at Niall? Or why you've been lying to me all week?" Kelsey asked me while we were standing side-by-side in the upstairs bathroom, applying our mascara in the mirror.

"Nope. Tonight is not about me. We can talk about it in the morning."

"I'm gonna let you get away with that for now, because I am freaking out."

"About the party?"

"No, about Niall. He's hiding something from me, I can tell. He's been acting super weird for days."

"Niall is always super weird. I don't get it, but it's what you love about him," I said sarcastically.

"I'm serious, he's really jumpy. Every time I enter the same room as him for the last few days, he looks at me like I scare the shit out of him."

"You're freaking over nothing, dude. Chill out, let's enjoy this night, and you can figure out what's going on with your spaz boyfriend tomorrow."

She nodded, took a deep breath, and continued straightening her hair while I went downstairs to make sure Niall was actually putting the food out, and not just eating it.

"Hey, freak, stop being such a freak," I whispered, smacking Niall on the back of the head when I came into the kitchen.

"OW! What are you talking about?"

"She knows you're up to something because you get all froggy if she comes near you. Chill out!" I scolded, whacking him again.

"Alright! Stop hitting me! Go get the big cooler and 2 bags of ice from the garage, would ya?"

I smacked him one more time for good measure, and went to the garage as he asked. I got outside and realized the idiot had put the cooler up on a shelf I couldn't reach. There was a rake in the corner that I decided to use to knock the cooler down, but as soon as I stuck the rake through the cooler's handle to pull it toward me, I heard a familiar voice call out from the end of the driveway.

"Careful, little girl! Wouldn't want you to hit that pretty head of yours."

"Greg?! Oh, my God, I didn't know you were gonna be here tonight," I said, embracing him.

"Shh! It's a surprise. I heard my little brother is finally asking that girl to marry him, and I wanted to be here to see what she says."

"Be nice! He's freaking out in there. You should go talk him down."

"I don't know. Between the two of us, you're the only one who's proposed marriage before."

"Will I never live that down? I was 9, Greg. Quite frankly, it was pervy of you to say yes. Now, are you going to get that cooler down for me, or what?"

He laughed, pulling it off the shelf. I put the ice inside, and led him through the side door.

"Greg! What are you doing here?" Niall asked as Greg and I entered the kitchen.

"Wanted to witness the big show."

"What big show? Oh, my God! Greg!" Kelsey shouted, coming into the kitchen, seeing who'd spoken, and jumping into his arms for a hug. "This is a nice surprise."

"I'm just so proud of you two, being grown-ups, playing house. Thought I'd pop in for the party."

"Thank you," Kelsey smiled. "Niall, get your brother a drink."

Niall grabbed a beer from the fridge, and handed it to Greg whispering, "Nice cover, bro."

....

Not wanting to be in my own head, I attempted to drink myself into a stupor as more and more people arrived. Tipsy, I stepped onto the front porch for a smoke around 9 o'clock, and Greg found me.

"Still got that nasty habit, I see."

"If that's not the pot calling the kettle black," I said, spotting the cigarette in his hand. "Why do you think I started in the first place?"

"Oh, don't tell me that! Now I feel like a villain."

"Sorry," I laughed. "You were just so cool and I wanted you to notice me." Okay, confessing your love for Greg is probably a very bad, booze-induced idea.

A darkness came over Greg's face as he leaned into me. "I noticed." Don't kiss me, don't kiss me, don't kiss me. He pressed his mouth to mine, his tongue begging for entrance.

"Greg, I can't," I said, gently pushing him away from me.

"C'mon, it'll be just like last time. No one has to know," he whispered, moving in to kiss me again.

"No, it's not that. I'm - I'm with someone."

"I don't see him here." His face was so close to mine, and then he was suddenly shoved away from me.

"Now you do," Zayn said, appearing out of nowhere, and knocking Greg to the ground. "The lady said no."

"Fuck you, asshole!" Greg yelled, getting up and shoving Zayn in the chest.

Zayn moved to push him back, and I jumped between them, instinctively protecting Zayn. "Greg, stop! You're drunk! Go inside and cool off."

"This isn't over," Greg threatened, walking into the house.

"Yeah, I'll come find you later," Zayn retorted, trying to get around me.

"No. You. Won't," I said, punctuating each word with a poke between his ribs. As soon as I heard the door slam, I shoved Zayn hard in the chest. "What are you doing?!"

"Defending you! Which, by the way, you promised me I wouldn't have to do against that guy."

"So you thought you'd show up here all knight in shining armor, and everything would be okay?"

"What? No. I came here to tell you that I don't want us to end this way, and that I don't care how many times you ignore my calls, I'm not going to stop calling until we fix this."

"Why not? I told you I need time!"

"Well, that's too fucking bad!"

"Hey!" Niall called from the porch, startling us both. "If you two have quite finished, I'm about to do a thing here."

We followed him into the house, and he called everyone into the living room.

"If I can just have everybody's attention for a minute, I want to say something. Kelsey, can you come up here with me?" I caught his eye as Kelsey crossed the room to him, and I mouthed the words 'take a deep breath.' He did, smiling as he took Kelsey's hand. "I just wanted to say thanks to all of you for being here tonight. We're really glad you could make it, it means a lot to both of us. But more importantly," he said, turning to Kelsey, and getting down on one knee, "there's something I need to say to just you."

"Niall...what are you doing?" she asked slowly, blushing from her hairline to her chest, and giggling nervously.

"Kelsey, I have loved you for longer than I can even remember. I know it's taken me a long time to ask you this, but it's not because I wasn't sure. I've only ever been sure of you. Of us. Will you marry me?" The room was buzzing with silent energy as Niall pulled the ring from his pocket and held it out to her. I couldn't hear her answer, but I knew what it was because Niall picked her up over his shoulder and spun her around, shouting, "She said yes! She said yes!"

The whole room was laughing and clapping, so I had to shout to be heard over the noise. "Niall! The ring!"

"Oh, right. The ring," he said, setting her down. "Should I get back on my knee, or - "

"Just give it to her, Niall," I laughed. He slid the ring on her finger, and everyone cheered again while they kissed. Zayn slipped his hand into mine, but I pulled it away quickly as Kelsey came over to me. I briefly glimpsed the look of pain that washed over his face before he walked away from me and out the front door.

"You knew!" Kelsey accused me, pulling me in for a hug.

"Of course I did," I laughed, gripping her tightly.

"When did he tell you?"

"About a week ago," I confessed.

"So that's why you've both been acting so weird."

"Mostly. I promise to tell you everything later, but right now, I have to go."

"What? Are you serious?"

"I'll be back!" I shouted, running for the door. Zayn was halfway across the yard by the time I got outside. "Zayn! Wait!" I stopped dead in my tracks at the end of the porch when he turned around and I saw the anger and hurt in his eyes.

"What?" he spat.

"Why won't you leave me alone?"

"You chased me out here to ask me why I won't leave you alone?"

"I'm sorry. That came out wrong. I meant, what you were saying before, about how you're not going to stop calling..."

"I'm not."

"But why?"

"Because you keep saying you need time, but this happened to me, too, and I don't need time. I need you! Because I love you, you crazy woman, and I didn't want to tell you like this, shouting across your best friend's front lawn, but you've left me no other options because you won't answer your fucking phone. So there it is. I LOVE YOU!"

I don't know what I was expecting him to say, but it wasn't that. I was too shocked to move or speak, so we stood there staring at each other until he turned away. "Zayn!"

He turned back, rushed toward me, and kissed me the way I needed to be kissed, pulling me in, both hands behind my neck. He broke away, but held my face still in front of his. "You made me promise not to hurt you like all the other boys before. It's a promise I'm trying to keep, so just let me love you. Please."

"How do you know you're not just feeling this way because I accidentally got pregnant, and lost the baby? Maybe this is just grief."

"Because I've felt this way since long before then. I fell in love with you the night we went to that party at Liam's. I brought you home with me, and I was too scared you'd run if I told you then, so I said you were beautiful instead." He tucked my hair behind my ear, and wiped away the tears that had started running down my cheeks. "I wanted to say it in Key West, but I thought it was still too soon. I've almost said it a hundred times since then. I stopped myself from telling you in the hospital last week because I didn't want you to think I was saying it for the wrong reason."

"And now?"

"Now I'm saying it because I'm terrified I'll lose you if I don't."

"Zayn - "

He cut me off with a kiss. "I love you. Please don't break my heart."

"God, I suck at these conversations, Zayn. I care about you a lot. Definitely more than anyone I've ever been with before, but I'm not sure I'm there yet. This whole pregnancy thing has me really confused, and I don't want to say it for the wrong reason either. Leaving you now would break my heart, too. I know I don't want that, but I'm still not sure what I do want. I hope you can understand that." He nodded, holding me tight, and burying his face in my neck. "I have to go back in there. You're welcome to come with me, but I get it if you want to leave."

"How much does everyone know?"

"I told Niall everything, but I didn't want to stress Kelsey out before the party. She's suspicious, and she'll probably figure it out if you don't come back inside, but I can deal with it."

"Can you explain what I walked up on between you and Greg before I decide?"

I sighed, "It was nothing, really. He's drunk, and I said something stupid about how I wanted his attention when we were teenagers, and he kissed me. I pushed him off right away, but he wasn't taking no for an answer until you stopped him."

Zayn started breathing heavily through his nose, and moved to punch the wall behind me, but I grabbed his fist before it connected with the bricks. "I'm gonna kill him," he muttered through clenched teeth.

"Not if you break your hand on the side of this house. It's okay, babe. I'll make sure I'm not alone with him for the rest of the night, but if you come inside, you have to promise me no fighting."

"And if he starts it?"

"Then I guess I'll have to have a very uncomfortable conversation with Niall, and you can take all your pent up rage out on me in 10-12 days," I said, hooking my hands behind his neck.

"Why 10-12 days?"

"Saw my doctor yesterday. That's how long she said we have to wait."

"Wait for wh - ohhhh!" His eyes widened as he realized what I was alluding to. "Is that what you want? Me taking my rage out on you?"

I nodded, smirking, and Zayn pushed me against the wall with his hand around my throat. I slipped both of my hands under his shirt, dragging my nails down his back, and he responded by thrusting his hips into mine, and tightening his grip on my throat so I had to open my mouth. He was pulling my bottom lip into his mouth with his teeth when Niall came outside.

"Oh, good. You've made up. Does that mean you're coming back inside now?"

"Dude, your timing seriously sucks tonight," I laughed, putting my hands on Zayn's hips and pushing him away from me slightly.

"Sorry, but I need you to deal with Greg. He's drunk and he's acting like an asshole. You've always been better at talking him down than I have. Besides, he's pissing me off, and I'm trying to have a good time tonight."

I looked at Zayn, begging him to understand with my eyes. He nodded slightly, and I squeezed his hand. "I'll be right there, Ni."

Niall thanked me and went back in the house, and Zayn threw me against the wall again as soon as the door closed. "I'll let you handle this on your own, but if he lays a finger on you, I'll fucking kill him," he said darkly, and then kissed me hard on the mouth before letting me go.

....

Zayn stayed in the living room, and I went in search of Greg. I found him in the kitchen alone, mixing himself a fresh drink. I grabbed it out of his hand, and dumped it down the drain. "I think you've had enough."

"I don't," he said, snatching the glass from me. "Go tend to your boyfriend's ego."

"I can't because it appears I'm the only person here tonight that's willing to tend to yours."

"Well, well. Look who's gone and gotten themselves a backbone," he slurred.

"Don't be a dick, Greg. I'm sorry that I'm not the little girl down the street with the hopeless crush on you anymore, but for fuck's sake, handle it like a man. I've grown up, and found myself a man who loves me, I don't need your crap. Now, have some water, and stop ruining your brother's night. He's sick of you sulking around the house like a battered child, but he loves you too much to say that to your face."

"You'll be back. When pretty boy fucks you over like everyone else, you'll come crawling home to me. You always do."

I cracked one hard slap across his left cheek, and grabbed his chin between my thumb and my finger, turning him back to look at me. "You don't get to speak to me that way. I'm not one of those dumb sluts you're always gallivanting across the world with. I know the real you, I always have, but I overlooked it because your brother is my best friend, and you were always kind to me. Clearly, we're done with that now. Grow up, Greg. Get over yourself."

I turned to walk out of the kitchen and Niall was standing in the doorway. "How long has this been going on, then?"

"Niall, I -" Greg started, but Ni put a hand up to quiet him.

"No, no. Don't bother. Call yourself a cab. Anyone that disrespects my friends in my home, is no longer welcome in my home. Family included."

Greg nodded and shoved past him on his way out.

"Thank you," I whispered.

"Don't. You can leave, too."

"Niall!"

"You lied to me! How long have you been sleeping with him? Does Zayn know?"

"It's - "

"Never mind," he cut me off. "I don't want to know. Go home, Lou."

I ran upstairs to grab my jacket and purse.

To: ZM Sent: 9:49pm  
I need you to take me home. Right now.

From: ZM Received: 9:50pm  
Where r u?

To: ZM Sent: 9:50pm  
Upstairs. I'll meet you outside.

I made it downstairs and out the front door without anyone noticing me leaving. I got outside and found Zayn pinning Greg to the ground with his knee in Greg's back.

"Oh, my God! What are you doing?!"

"He attacked me when I came outside," Zayn said, twisting Greg's arm.

"Damn it, Greg! Let it go!" I yelled as his cab pulled up in front of the house. "Go home and sober up. Whenever you're ready, I'll take your apology in the form of a bottle of wine. An expensive one," I said as Zayn lifted him off the ground, and shoved him into the back of the cab.

Zayn and I got in his car, silent and unmoving for a while, just breathing and holding hands.

"I can buy you a whole vineyard if you want," he said, breaking the silence, and we both laughed until I started crying. "Oh, babe. I'm sorry. I was trying to cheer you up, not make you cry."

"It's not that. Niall's really pissed at me. He walked in on me telling Greg off, and I guess he figured out that we slept together. He thinks it's been some kind of on-going thing that I've hidden from him or something, I don't know. He asked me to leave. We've been best friends since kindergarten, and we've never fought like this before. Not about anything real."

"My house or yours?"

"Yours."

He started the car, and pulled onto the street. "Do you want to give me road head? It might make you feel better."

I smirked, whacking his arm with the back of my hand. "How romantic."

"I do my best," he laughed. "You got me all hot and bothered on the porch earlier, just trying to get us back on track."

My phone buzzed, and praying it was Niall, I tore it out of my purse.

From: Kelsey Received: 10:04pm Where'd you go?

To: Kelsey Sent: 10:05pm Ask Niall. We'll talk tomorrow. Congratulations btw

From: Kelsey Received: 10:05pm K thx <3

"You know what? Fuck this. I don't want to go home. It's only 10 o'clock. What are Liam and Harry doing?"

"They're at some club opening downtown. Do you want to go?"

"Let's do it!" I said, smiling, and checking my makeup in my visor's mirror.

"You're beautiful, stop primping," Zayn said, pulling his phone out to call Liam.

"Never," I mumbled, searching through my bag for my lip gloss.

"ZAYNNNN!!!" I heard Liam yell over thumping bass when he answered. "You have to come down here, man! This place is sick!"

"That's why I'm calling. Lou and I are on our way. Can you make sure we're on the list?"

"Took care of it this morning! I knew she'd take you back! You've got a plus one at the door, now hurry up!!" he shouted, disconnecting.

"You told him?"

"Not really. I said we got in a fight our last day in L.A., and that you wanted some space for a little while."

"You can, you know."

"What?"

"You can tell him. And Harry. If you want to."

"Are you sure?"

"Yeah. You were right earlier, and Niall said it the other day, too, actually. It wasn't just my baby. I've been horrible to you, and I'm sorry for that. I think I've just been so mad about it, my anger mad me irrational and selfish."

"You're mad at me?"

"No! I'm mad at myself! I totally knew about the whole antibiotics cancelling out birth control thing, but I think I got caught up in everything that happened that night. With Harry and Louis, and you and Liam fighting, and you telling me about your dad. I just...forgot."

"It happens. It happened to us, and it sucked. It still sucks, but I don't blame you. We'll just have to be more careful from now on. In fact," he said, pulling up to a red light, "I've already bought this in the hopes that we'd work this out." He reached into the backseat, and pulled out the biggest box of condoms I've ever seen.

"Oh. My. God." I burst out laughing. "Babe, half of these are going to expire before we even get a chance to use them!"

"We'll just have to try really hard to get through as many as we can," he laughed, kissing me. I raked my fingers through the back of his hair, holding his lips to mine until the cars behind us started honking.

"Light's green," I whispered breathily, letting him go. Zayn hit the gas, but pulled over into the first parking lot he saw. "What are you doing?"

"Detour," he said, putting the car in park, and undoing both of our seat belts. He patted his lap, flashing me dirty eyes. "Get over here."

"Zayn, we can't. I told you what the doctor said."

"No sex. Just an old-fashioned, high-school-style make-out session."

"Hot!" Impressed, I climbed over the center console and attached my lips to his. Using his thumbs, he pushed the end of my dress up my thighs so I could spread my legs easier. I leaned into him, putting my hands on his shoulders, and grinding my hips in slow figure 8s. Zayn slid his fingers further up my dress, gripping into my ass. "Shit, babe," I said, pulling out of the kiss, "this might be a bad idea. I'm not gonna want to stop."

"C'mere," he growled, grabbing the back of my neck, and pulling my mouth back to his. He slipped his right thumb under my panties, and started rubbing quick, hard circles over my clit, holding his left hand behind my neck to keep me from trying to stop him. The circles got slower and softer as the windows fogged up and I came closer to climax. He bit my throat gently and just as I was about to finish, there was a sharp rap on the driver's side window. Zayn quickly yanked my dress back down as he pressed the button to lower the window. "Evening, Officer," he said, pushing me slightly away, toward his knees, so the cop would see his pants weren't undone.

"License and registration, son. Miss, your ID, too, and please move over to the passenger seat." I awkwardly made my way back across the center console, doing my best not to flash the cop my goods, and Zayn handed him our information. "I'll be right back." He walked back to his squad car, and Zayn and I cracked up.

"This is your fault," he laughed.

"Mine? This was your idea!"

"Well, if you hadn't been wearing that dress and gone all 'take your rage out on me, baby' and made me fight that douche bag twice, I wouldn't have been so pissed off and horny."

I grabbed him over his jeans, and kissed him roughly on the mouth, biting his bottom lip. "I won't apologize. I like you pissed off and horny." I swiftly undid his button and zipper, and slipped my hand into his boxers, stroking his length.

"Lou! The cop," Zayn hissed through his teeth, but he didn't do anything to stop me.

"Scared?" I whispered, leaning in and biting his earlobe.

"No, but I don't want to go to jail tonight either. Damn, girl, don't do that," he moaned when I slid my tongue in his ear. His cock twitched in my hand though, so I knew he hadn't meant it. I could see the cop approaching us again in the mirror, so I removed my hand from inside Zayn's pants and tugged his shirt down to try and hide his erection.

"You two are free to go, but save the heavy petting for home," he said, handing Zayn our IDs.

"Thank you, Officer," I said, trying not to laugh because Zayn looked like he was going to shit himself. The cop pulled out of the lot, and Zayn turned the defroster on to defog the windows.

We got back on the main road and Zayn looked at me expectantly. "Well..."

"Well what?"

"You're not just gonna leave me like this, are you?" he asked, gesturing at the situation he had going on in his jeans.

"I think I am."

"You're such a tease!"

"Hey, handsome, I didn't get mine either. I was very rudely interrupted by Officer Buzz Kill back there."

He groaned, buttoning his pants one handed as he merged onto the freeway.


	13. Chapter 13

It wasn't until we were standing outside the club that I realized I must have left my jacket at Kelsey and Niall's. Zayn held me against his chest, rubbing my arms to try and keep me warm, while we stood in the slowly moving line.

"How did you forget your coat? It's fucking freezing out here."

"I don't know. I went upstairs to grab it and my purse, but I must have gotten distracted texting you. I just wanted to get out of there. Niall has never looked at me like that before."

"Like what?"

"Like he was disappointed. Like he looks at Greg."

"That's harsh."

"It's true. Greg might be older, but Niall's the mature, responsible one. Their parents' divorce was really messy and Greg took it hard. They moved here from Ireland with their mom when it was over, but their dad stayed and they hardly even speak to him. Niall was really young so he doesn't remember most of it, but Greg does and he's always used it to justify his behavior to himself. He was a bad boy behind the scenes, but he could charm the pants off of teachers, friends' parents, neighbors, you name it, so no one ever suspected him when cash disappeared from a fundraiser or someone's mom's jewelery went missing at a party. He charmed his way through high school and college and hundreds of girls, but under the surface, he's a cold-hearted bastard. I can't believe it's taken me this long to stop letting him charm me."

"Name?" the bouncer asked when we got to the front of the line.

"Zayn Malik," Zayn said, handing over our IDs for the second time that night.

He nodded, handing them back to Zayn, and stood aside to let us in. Liam had said this place was great, but not really being all that into nightclubs myself, I wasn't very impressed. It felt like just another club to me; hot, crowded, and loud.

"Harry just texted me," Zayn said, checking his phone. "They're upstairs."

"Can we get a drink first? All this fighting has sobered me up, and that's not a state I want to be in today."

He grabbed my hand and led me across the dance floor to the bar. I sidled up to it and waited to be served with Zayn behind me, his hands on my hips and his mouth leaving lingering kisses along my exposed neck and shoulder. He wasn't paying any attention to our surroundings, so when I noticed that the bartender coming our way was Louis, I grabbed Zayn by the front of his shirt, and spun him around so he was facing me, his back against the bar. I caught Louis' eye, and he quickly turned and went back around the other side.

"You know what, baby? I've reconsidered. Why don't you go to the men's room and text me when the coast is clear. We'll finish what we started in the car," I whispered seductively, sliding my hands under the front of his shirt, and raking my nails down his abs to his waistband. He gave me a dark grin, biting his lower lip, and disappeared into the crowd. As soon as he was out of sight, I whipped my phone out to warn Liam.

To: Li Sent: 11:02pm  
Did you know Louis works here?!

From: Li Received: 11:02pm  
U fucking serious?

To: Li Sent: 11:03pm  
Yeah. I distracted Z. Keep Haz upstairs.

From: ZM Received: 11:03pm  
Ready?

From: Li Received: 11:03pm  
U guys comin up?

To: Li Sent: 11:04pm  
In a little bit.

To: ZM Sent: 11:04pm  
;)

I tucked my phone back into my purse, and sneaked into the men's room.

"Get over here," Zayn said in a throaty rumble, and pulled me across the threshold into a stall. He grabbed my ass as he hiked the bottom of my dress up, and lifted me into his arms, slamming my back into the stall door, and putting his mouth on mine. I let out a deep groan when Zayn wrapped my legs around himself and picked up where he left off in the front seat, stroking my heat with his thumb. He pulled back slightly, and slapped my center with the flat of his hand, causing my back to arch, and sending me over the edge. I had to bite his bottom lip to keep myself from screaming. "Good girl," he whispered against my lips, setting me down. "Now get on your knees."

I knelt on the toilet seat so my feet wouldn't be seen under the stall door if someone came in, and kissed him hard on the mouth while I undid his pants and he pulled the top of my dress down, freeing my breasts. I licked the beads of pre cum already forming at his tip,and fucked him with my mouth, hard and slow, inch by inch, until he was hitting the back of my throat.

"You gonna let me cum in that pretty mouth of yours?" he asked, roughly squeezing my tits in his massive hands. I moaned my confirmation, massaging his girth with my tongue. "Fuck, baby, do that again," he whimpered, gripping my chest even harder. I complied, and immediately felt his hot liquid filling my mouth. "God, you're so fucking beautiful," he whispered as I swallowed down everything he gave me, and he pulled his dick out of my mouth and shoved it between my tits, which he was still holding.

He thrust his hips into my chest a few times before I put my hands up to stop him. "You think you can go again?"

"I can do whatever you want, baby," he said softly, placing light kisses along my jaw down to my throat.

"Good," I whispered, handing him a condom out of my purse.

"Where'd you get this?"

"Sneaked it out of that big box in the car when you weren't looking," I laughed.

"I thought you said we couldn't until next week."

"Well, we can't do it the old-fashioned way," I said, smirking.

"You dirty little slut! Turn around," he ordered, tearing the foil packet open. I did as I was told, grabbing the back of the toilet to maintain my balance. Zayn ran his length along my slit a few times before he put the condom on, to warm me up again. "Hold on, I don't think you're ready yet. I want you soaking wet for me."

He picked me up and turned me around, setting me on the back of the toilet. Grabbing the backs of my knees and spreading me wide, he sat on the toilet facing me, and starting licking my pussy like it was his fucking job.

After a few minutes, he released my legs and put his hands to my chest again, letting me rest my thighs on his shoulders. "God, you taste so good," he whispered into my sensitive flesh, and those words were my undoing. I felt myself dripping, while Zayn fumbled with the condom. He grabbed my hands to pull me onto him, leaving my legs around his neck. Using my own juices as lube, he easily slid himself inside of me. "Mmm, I love this tight, little ass," he moaned, biting my throat and moving his hands up my back to bring me closer to him. He stood, never breaking rhythm, and set me down on the back of the toilet again, so he could get better leverage. Holding tight to my hip with his left hand, he started flicking my clit with his right thumb as he pounded me.

"Ready?" he asked, pulling out and sloppily kissing my mouth.

"Yeah," I responded, out of breath. He gave my ass one firm slap as he slammed back into it. My muscles tightened hard around him, and he shuddered, collapsing on top of me, breathing heavily, as he climaxed.

"You gonna be okay to walk?" Zayn laughed, pulling out of me and flushing the condom.

"Walk? Yes. Sit? Probably not," I said, adjusting my dress.

"Sorry," he grinned sheepishly.

"Don't be. That was hot," I whispered, pulling him toward me for a kiss. I could taste myself on him, which only revved me up again, so I jumped into his arms, wrapping myself around him.

"You're gonna be the death of me, woman," he whispered, tucking my hair behind my ear, and pressing my back against the wall. "I'd love to stay in here, fucking you six ways to Sunday, all night, but we should go before we get caught."

"You're right," I pouted, unhooking my legs from his waist and standing on my own.

"Stay here," he whispered, gently pushing me into the corner of the stall. He swept the rest of the bathroom and the hallway for stragglers before calling out to me. "All clear, babe."

I quickly checked my hair and makeup in the mirror, and joined him in the hall.

"You want that drink now?" he asked, taking me by the hand, and leading me toward the bar.

"Let's get it upstairs. I think we've kept Liam and Harry waiting long enough." I rushed him past the bar to the winding staircase across the club, desperately trying to avoid another fist fight between him and Louis.

We reached the landing at the top, and immediately heard the boys call out to us. They were seated on a massive black leather couch, waving their arms wildly to get our attention.

I ran over, and sank onto Harry's lap, throwing my arms around his neck for a big hug.

"About fucking time," Liam said, as I leaned over and placed a kiss on his cheek. "Where have you guys been for the last 20 minutes?"

"Uh, catching up," Zayn smirked, shaking Liam's hand.

"Is that what they're calling it these days? Do I get to 'catch up' with you, too?" Harry teased, thrusting his hips into me.

"Oooh, Harry, don't," I winced.

"Ha! He got you good, huh?" he joked, poking me in the ribs.

"Shut up," I laughed. "Is there a shot girl around here somewhere?"

Liam flagged a waitress down and ordered us a round of drinks. She walked away and I caught Liam's eye, giving him a look that he took exactly as I meant it: 'Tell Zayn about Louis.'

"Hey, I need to talk to you for a second," Liam said, taking Zayn by the elbow and walking him away from the table.

"What's that all about?" Harry asked, squeezing me into him.

"Who knows with those two? If I wasn't with Zayn, I'd tell them to hurry up and consummate their bromance already. What about you? You been having a good night, Haz?" I swept his curly fringe out of his eyes as I changed the subject.

"Yeah, I was beating the men off with a stick before you came over here and ruined my game."

"Well, excuse the shit out of me," I laughed. "Which one have you got your eye on?"

He discreetly pointed at a beautiful, brown-haired boy halfway across the upper level of the club. "You should have seen the look of disappointment on his face when you sat on my lap."

"Look who's got his self-confidence back," I giggled, swatting his chest.

Zayn and Liam came back over to us then, just as the waitress was approaching with our drinks. She set them on the table, and Zayn sat down next to Harry, pulling me onto his lap instead.

"So the rendezvous in the bathroom was a distraction?" he whispered angrily into my ear.

"Kind of," I whispered back, a little frightened by the dark twinkle in his eyes.

"We'll discuss that, and your punishment, later," he said, handing me my drink.

....

Several rounds and many laughs later, I was drunk again, and didn't want to be on the couch anymore. "Let's go downstairs and dance, baby," I whispered, placing light kisses and bites along Zayn's jawline from his chin to his throat.

"I don't dance. Take Liam."

"Ugh. You don't swim, you don't dance," I pouted.

"I know, but I'm a great fuck. Totally makes up for it," he growled, kissing the tender skin behind my left ear. "Liam, take my girl dancing!"

Liam grabbed my hand and pulled me out of Zayn's lap.

"Really?" I raised my eyebrows at him.

"Yep. Have fun," he smirked, giving me a spank.

I let Liam drag me to the spiral staircase, but I stopped when we were about to pass the boy Harry had pointed out earlier. "Hey," I said, tapping his shoulder.

"Hi," he smiled, turning to me.

"My curly-haired friend over there thinks you're really cute. You should go talk to him."

"Oh, really? I assumed you were with him."

"No," I laughed. "The dark, broody one next to him is mine."

"Alright, maybe I will, then," he spoke, his smile getting even wider.

"C'mon, girl," Liam interrupted, tugging my hand.

I stopped him again when we reached the top of the steps. "I think I'm too drunk for stairs, Li." I squealed as he threw me over his shoulder like I was a rag doll. "LIAM! My dress!"

"Sorry," he laughed, pulling it down to make sure the whole club didn't get a free show, while I held tight to my chest, ensuring my boobs wouldn't pop out as I hung over his back upside-down. He stopped in the middle of the dance floor, set me back on my feet, and immediately started gyrating to the bass of the dance track pounding through the speakers. I pressed my body against his, throwing my arms around his neck, and matched his movements beat for beat. "Damn, girl! If Zayn won't take you dancing, you're gonna have to start spending your Saturday nights with me," he shouted over the music, as he spun me out and back to him.

"I'll let you run that one by him," I laughed, shaking my hips.

"You wanna tell me what really happened last week in L.A., then? I know it was more than a disagreement. Zayn wouldn't have been that upset over a silly lover's quarrel."

"Look at you, being all in touch with everyone's feelings."

"So that's a 'no,' then?"

"That's a 'no.' Zayn will tell you when he's ready."

"You can tell me if he's hurting you."

I stopped abruptly, putting my hands on his chest, and looking him square in the eye. "Why the fuck would you go and say a horrible thing like that?"

"Well, I know how he can get when he's mad enough."

"So, you thought he hit me, and I forgave him? I'm not sure if that speaks more to what you think of me, or to what you think of the man who calls you his best friend," I said angrily, turning to walk away from him.

He caught me by the wrist and swung me around to face him again. "I'm sorry. My housekeeper found blood in the grout on the bathroom floor. Zayn didn't mention anything about either of you getting hurt, and I assumed the worst. I know I don't know you very well, but I know you're a really compassionate person, and I've seen you forgive his less-than-charming behavior before."

"At your request! You told me he was broken when we met, so I've let more slide than I normally would. I'm compassionate, Liam, yes, but I don't stand for getting smacked around. As for the blood, not that it's any of your business, I was pregnant. I lost the baby on the bathroom floor. I'm sorry about the staining, but I'm sure Zayn will pay to have the tile re-grouted."

"Jesus, Lou, I don't care about the floor! Are you okay? No wonder Zayn didn't tell me. He was such a fucking wreck last time."

"Last time?" I asked. I felt like I had been kicked in the stomach.

"Shit! I shouldn't have said that. I'm drunk, forget I mentioned it," he said, trying to push past me. It was my turn to grab him by the wrist.

"Oh no, you don't! What do you mean 'last time?'"

"I thought he would have told you about Natalia by now."

"Well, he hasn't, so spill it, Payne."

"She's the ex I told you about a few months ago. She got pregnant right after high school. He was over the moon about it, but she wasn't ready or whatever. She came home one day, announced that she'd had an abortion, packed her shit, and left without another word."

"Jesus Christ," I whispered, completely out of breath. "Why hasn't he told me about this?"

"I told you she fucked him up. He probably didn't want you to feel pressured to stay with him, just because Natalia didn't."

"Fuck. I wish you hadn't told me."

"You made me!"

"I know, but now I have to pretend I don't know anything about it."

"Why?"

"Because he trusted you to keep it a secret, and he trusted me not to push you for information. So dip me, we're pretending this conversation never happened."

"Got it," he confirmed, pressing our bodies together, and dipping me so low, my hair brushed the floor. "I'm sorry about the baby," he whispered, whipping me upright again, and he placed a soft kiss on my cheek, right at the corner of my mouth.

"I need you to act appropriately shocked when he tells you," I said, pulling away as the song changed to something much slower.

He wrapped his strong arms around me and whispered something I definitely wasn't expecting. "I would do anything you asked me to."

"Liam - "

"Mind if I cut in?" Zayn asked, tapping Liam on the shoulder.

"She's all yours," he smiled, relinquishing me into Zayn's arms, and grabbed the nearest girl to dance with. Something in his smile wasn't genuine, but I was too drunk, and to preoccupied with all the other crap that had happened earlier in the night, to try and figure it out.

"I thought you didn't dance," I teased, letting Zayn take the lead.

"I like the slow ones," he said, leaning in for a kiss. "Besides, Harry's totally wrapped up in some guy upstairs."

"Oh, good! They're actually talking?"

"You knew about this?" Zayn laughed.

"I encouraged it! Harry needs to have some fun, don't you think? You and I spend every available minute together, and he can't always rely on Liam to keep him entertained. He needs a good boy-shaped distraction."

"You're right," he said, spinning me around. "I'm just worried about him. I don't think he's entirely over the whole Louis situation. Especially after what happened at his birthday party."

"He's been getting better since then, though, hasn't he?"

"Yeah."

"Okay, so maybe he's not entirely over it or past it, but getting back out there might help. He doesn't have to spend forever with the guy. He just needs a cute boy to have a good time with."

"Again, you're right."

"I know," I laughed. "Now kiss me."

He pulled me in close as the song changed again, and smiled against my lips while he kissed me, running his fingers through my hair.

"Ugh, get a room!" Liam shouted over the music.

Zayn lifted me off the floor into his arms, his lips still attached to mine, and flipped Liam off. He set me down when Liam laughed, and looked into my eyes with a devilish grin on his face. "Do you want to?"

"Do I want to what?"

"Get a room. We're downtown already. Let's just pick a casino and go."

"Seriously?"

"Why not?"

"Okay. Let's bring Liam and Harry, though. Really make a night of it."

"Sounds good. Liam! Grab a girl, we're rollin' out!" He grabbed my hand, and we ran across the dance floor, back up the stairs to Harry. "C'mon, man. We're hitting the casino. Can you and your new boyfriend get supplies?"

"He's not my boyfriend," Harry said, rolling his eyes. "And I came with Liam."

"We'll go with Li, you take my car," Zayn said, tossing Harry his keys. He threw me over his shoulder, and headed for the stairs. "Let's go, baby."

"Zayn, what casino?" Harry called behind us.

"MGM?"

"Got it. See you in 30."

I gave Harry an upside down wave, and held tight to Zayn's waist as he rushed back to Liam.

"Let's go, bro. You're driving." We made our way to the front door, and Zayn stopped just as we were about to step outside. "Wait, I thought you were bringing someone."

"No one was up to my standards," Liam said, walking to his car.

"You're losing your touch, mate."

"Put me down," I said, swatting Zayn on the ass. "What about that girl you were dancing with, Liam?"

"Well, now that I've seen your moves, nobody really compares, do they?" he smirked, opening the car door for me. I rolled my eyes, climbing into the backseat.

....

We arrived at the casino less than 15 minutes later, and Liam handed his keys to the valet. Zayn went straight to the reception desk to procure us 3 rooms for the night, so Liam whisked me off to the lounge near the front entrance. He called out a drink order to the bartender, and he was already swaying his hips to the band's beat as he spun me onto the small dance floor with him. We were laughing and tearing it up until Zayn, Harry, and the boy from the club walked in and sat on the plush couches along the wall.

"We should find you a girl for the night," I said when the song ended.

"Can't I just have you?" he asked, smirking.

"You're so dumb," I laughed, taking our drinks from the bar, and leading the way to the table. "You gonna introduce us to your friend, Haz?"

"This is Liam, and Zayn's girlfriend, Lou. Guys, this is Phillip." Liam and I shook his hand, exchanged pleasantries, and took a seat on either side of Zayn. "So we're set for the night. Phillip and I got a case of beer, and a fifth each of rum, tequila, and whiskey. It's in Liam's room whenever we decide to go up."

"Nicely done, Harold," Liam said, handing him a $50 bill.

"Give it to Zayn. He paid for the rooms," Harry said, waving the money away.

"I'm keeping it then. Fee for entertaining your girl all night."

Zayn scoffed and stood, dragging me to the casino with him.

"C'mon, Zayn, he was joking!" Harry called out behind us.

"Babe, slow down! My feet are killing me," I whined, as he pulled me along. He slowed, but didn't stop, or say anything to me until we were at another bar in the middle of the casino. He sat on a bar stool, and grabbed me by the waist, holding me between his knees.

"Do you feel like I neglected you tonight?"

"No, of course not. I really think Liam was just joking," I said, putting my arms around his neck. "Let's order a drink here, it'll give you time to calm down, and then we'll go back."

"How do you do that?"

"Do what?"

"Whenever I get angry, you chill me out. You just take it in stride, pretend I'm not being a complete jerk, and say exactly the right thing to totally make me feel better."

"I must really like you, I guess," I said, smiling.

"I love you."

I kissed him to shut him up. I wasn't used to him saying that, to anyone saying it really. I'd only ever exchanged 'I love yous' with one guy before Zayn, and he'd completely destroyed me. As much as I cared for Zayn, I wasn't sure I could let that wall down again. Not yet.

"Oooh, hold on," I said, breaking away from him. "My phone's going off."

He flagged the bartender down while I dug my phone out of my purse. 3 missed calls from Kelsey, and 2 new text messages.

From: Kelsey Received: 1:36am  
Ni told me about u and Greg. Please call me. We need to talk.

From: Harold Edward Received: 1:37am  
None of us feel like gambling. Convince Z to come up to Li's room?

To: Harold Edward Sent: 1:40am  
Working on it, love.

"Kelsey wants to talk," I sighed, accepting the drink Zayn held out to me.

"Not tonight," he said, snatching my phone out of my hand, and slipping it into his pocket.

"Harry said they're heading up to Liam's room. We going or what?"

"Yeah, yeah. Bottoms up."

We slugged our drinks back, and walked to the bank of gilded elevators hand-in-hand.

"Let me just text Kelsey back so she doesn't think I'm ignoring her."

Zayn rolled his eyes and handed my phone back.

To: Kelsey Sent: 1:49am  
Downtown with Zayn. I'll call you in the morning.

From: Kelsey Received: 1:50am  
Fine.

"Well she's fucking pissed."

"You already knew that, babe. Just put it out of your mind for now. Let's celebrate the fact that we made it out of the club without another Louis incident, and try to have a good time."

"Yes, well done, us," I said, failing to stifle a yawn.

"We can just go to our room if you're tired."

"No. You need to make sure things are smoothed over with Liam. I wouldn't want both of us to lose all our friends in one night."

"You haven't lost Kelsey and Niall," Zayn said, taking my hand and stepping off the elevator.

Liam opened the door at Zayn's first knock. "Lou, come on in. Speak to you outside, mate?" he asked, moving into the hall.

"Yeah. You okay, babe?"

I nodded, crossing the threshold, and let the door close behind me, leaving them in the hallway. "Harryyyyy!!" I yelled, dropping my purse and phone to the floor, and jumping to tackle him onto the bed. He caught me around the middle and we play wrestled until I realized we were the only people in the room. "Hey, what happened to your boy toy?"

"He said he was tired, but I think Ziam's little spat made him uncomfortable. We exchanged numbers, though. I think we're gonna try to get together next weekend."

"Well that's good! Sorry those idiots cock blocked you for tonight, though," I said, climbing off the bed and going to the mini bar. I grabbed the empty ice bucket and walked back to the front door with it. I opened the door and thrust the container into Zayn's arms. "If you two are gonna be out here anyway, make yourselves useful. Thanks! Harry, let's shotgun a beer!"

I heard Zayn laugh before the door closed all the way. Harry tossed me a beer and we raced chugging them down, finishing just as Zayn and Liam came back with the ice.

"You two finished petting each other, then?" Harry asked, flopping his long frame down on the couch.

"Oh, shut up, Hazza," Liam laughed, mixing each of us a drink.

"Where'd Phillip go?" Zayn asked, settling next to Harry and pulling me onto his lap.

"You two scared the poor boy off!" I scolded. "You both owe Harry big time now."

They both mumbled an embarrassed 'sorry,' and Liam pulled a deck of cards from his pants pocket.

"Bought these in the gift shop on the way up. Strip poker or strip blackjack?"

"Seeing as to how I'm the only girl here, and I have the least clothing to lose, I'm gonna vote we don't play either of those games," I laughed, downing the rest of my drink.

Liam took my glass and mixed me a fresh one. "Won't pretend I didn't see that one coming. What would you rather play?"

"Let's play a drinking game. I'm determined to get sloppy, slutty drunk."

"I am perfectly okay with that," Zayn said, squeezing my thigh.

"How about Drunk Driver?"

"Shuffle up and deal, love," Liam said, tossing me the deck, and setting my refilled glass on the table in front of me.

....

After we had each "driven" twice, Zayn and I were ready to head to our own room - more specifically, our own bed.

"Grab the tequila, baby. We're doing body shots when we get to the room."

"But we don't have any limes," Zayn laughed.

"That's okay, I got something sweet for ya," I winked, pulling Harry upright from the couch. "C'mon, pal. Let's get you to your room."

He groaned, but stood and put his arm around my shoulder. "Will you tuck me in?" he slurred.

"Sure," I laughed, walking him toward the door and grabbing my purse from the floor. "Night, Liam."

Zayn and I helped Harry get to his room at the end of the hall, and Zayn waited outside while I took Harry's shoes off for him, and got him into bed. I turned to sneak out, but he caught me by the wrist.

"Wait."

"Sorry, I thought you passed out."

"I'm glad you and Zayn made up."

"Me, too," I smiled.

"You're the first girl he's ever dated that isn't a total stuck up bitch."

"Thanks, Haz. I'm not planning on going anywhere anytime soon," I reassured him, patting his hand. He smiled, and closed his eyes, drifting off to sleep. I rejoined Zayn in the hall, and slipped out of my heels while we waited for the elevator. "Trade me," I said, pressing the button for our floor and handing him my shoes. He passed me the tequila, and I took a deep slug from the bottle. Instead of swallowing, I grabbed his face with my free hand, pulled him down to me, and pressed our lips together, pushing half of the alcohol from my mouth into his. We both swallowed, and Zayn deepened the kiss as he walked me back against the elevator wall.

"I'm gonna make you pay for lying to me earlier," he murmured into my skin, biting the side of my neck. The doors opened and I stuck my hand in my purse for our room key, which is when I realized my phone was missing.

"Shit!"

"What is it?" Zayn asked from the hall, holding the elevator doors open for me.

"I must have left my phone in Liam's room."

He laughed and rolled his eyes at me, moving to get back on the elevator. "Of course you did. Let's go."

"No, it's okay. I'll go. Here, take this," I said, giving him the room key and the tequila. "I'll be back in a few minutes."

"Hurry," he whispered, giving me a quick kiss and letting the doors close again.

I rode back down to Liam's floor, and gingerly walked to his room. He opened the door in nothing but his boxers, taking me by surprise.

"Whoa! Who knew all that was hiding under your clothes?" I joked, feeling strangely nervous.

"Lou! Is something wrong?"

"No, I forgot my phone. Can I come in?"

He nodded, standing back to let me enter. "So...you got Harry to bed okay?"

"Yeah, he's fine," I said, getting on my stomach to check under the couch. "Ooof, got it! Help me up."

Liam grabbed my hands and pulled me to my feet, right into his arms. He held me to his mostly naked body, a bit too close, for a bit too long. I cleared my throat, starting to feel uncomfortable.

"So - "

"Yeah, I'm gonna go," I cut him off and shuffled toward the door.

"Lou?"

"Yeah?" I turned to him.

"Umm..." Deep breath. "Night."

"Night, Liam." I let myself out, and headed back up to my room. I had given Zayn the only key, so I had to wait for him to open the door for me. "C'mon, babe! My feet hurt," I moaned, knocking for the third time.

He yanked the door wide open and pulled me into the room by my throat, throwing me against the wall. "I'm gonna make everything hurt, you lying little whore."


	14. Chapter 14

There was a knock on our hotel room door very early the next morning. Zayn groaned and rolled over, draping his arm across me. I shrugged him off, and turned around without opening my eyes. “Get the door, babe.”

"You get it," he mumbled.

"They’re your friends."

"It’s part of your punishment."

I pushed him in the chest, and grabbed the bathrobe from the floor as the knocking started again. “I’m coming!” I shouted, cinching the robe around my waist. I checked the peephole and quickly pulled the door open. “Harry, do you have any idea what time it is? What are you doing here?”

"Sorry. Can I come in for a minute?"

"Zayn, cover up! Harry’s coming in," I stood back to let him enter the suite, and followed him into the bedroom, immediately getting back under the sheets.

"Morning, Haz. What’s up?"

"Liam’s acting weird and he wants to leave. I just wanted to make sure you got your keys back," he said, setting them on the bedside table.

"Thanks. Everything else okay?"

"Uh…can I talk to you guys about something actually?"

"Of course, sit down," Zayn said, pulling my body against his, giving Harry room to stretch out beside us.

"This might sound totally crazy, but last night, at the club, I felt like…like…" He ran his fingers through his hair, and started playing with his bottom lip.

"Like what, Harry?" I asked, sitting up, concerned now.

"Nah, it just sounds paranoid."

"You can tell us anything, man," Zayn reassured him.

Harry took a deep breath and looked down at his fingers before speaking again. “Well, I felt good, like myself, for the first time in a really long time. As soon as I started feeling comfortable, though, like while I was talking to Phillip, I felt like someone was watching me.”

Zayn gripped my hand tightly under the covers, and gave me the tiniest shake of his head. “I’m sure it was nothing, man. You’re probably just psyching yourself out because it’s been so long since you felt good. Give it time.”

"Yeah, you’re probably right," Harry said, not looking totally convinced. He leaned over and gave us both a big hug. "Thanks, guys. I’ll let you get back to your naked shenanigans."

I held my breath until we heard the door to the suite click shut. “You’re gonna break my fingers if you don’t let go.”

"Sorry," Zayn exhaled, releasing my hand.

"So I take it we’re not telling him that it was probably Louis stalking him last night?"

"Definitely not. It’s taken care of."

“‘It’s taken care of?’ What does that mean? You never did tell me how we managed to get away without a scene.”

"Do you really want to talk about that now?" he asked, biting his bottom lip and undoing my robe. "We could just go back to what we were doing before we fell asleep."

"While that is a very tempting offer, I can’t help but feel like you’re trying to get away with the exact thing I was punished for last night."

"Caught me," he sighed, rolling on top of me anyway, and pinning my arms above my head. "Liam pulled the big-scary-Hulk routine and threatened him. May have smacked him around a little, too."

"May have? Wait, when was this?"

"I don’t know. One of the times he left to go to the bathroom, I guess."

"But before he took me to the dance floor."

"Yeah, I guess it would have had to been. We left after that."

"Harry didn’t start talking to Phillip until then. So if he felt like they were being watched, Louis obviously didn’t get Liam’s message."

"Shit, you’re right!" He jumped off the bed and scrambled to find his cell phone. "Where is it?"

"I think you left it on the couch. After we finished making that video…"

"Oh, yeah! Can’t wait to watch that later." He winked at me, and left the room. He came back a minute later, thumbs flying, texting rapidly. "Jackass sent me to voice mail."

"Well, come back to bed until he calls you back. I’m cold."

Zayn dove onto the bed, laying his slender frame over mine. “Oh, you might want to invest in some turtlenecks, babe,” he laughed, kissing my throat.

"Why?"

"Uh…you’ve got some bruises."

I shoved him off of me and ran to the bathroom mirror. My neck and breasts were covered in finger shaped marks. “Oh my God, Zayn!” I shouted, re-entering the room. “Now people really will think you beat me!”

"Who thinks I beat you?" he asked, confused, the smile immediately leaving his face.

 _Shit!_ “No one, it’s nothing.”

"It’s obviously something."

"Don’t get mad. Promise?"

"Lou, just tell me," he said, exasperated.

"Liam asked me last night if you were hitting me."

"He WHAT?!"

"Calm down. I sorted him out. Apparently, we didn’t clean the bathroom floor in L.A. as well as we thought, and his housekeeper called him about the blood. He jumped to conclusions," I explained, climbing back into bed.

"You told him about the baby?"

I nodded. “Felt like I had to at that point. And in the interest of being honest…”

"He didn’t."

"He did."

"Damn it! That is not how I wanted you to find out about her."

"I know, and I know I told you that you didn’t have to tell me about her until you were ready, but after last weekend, don’t you think that information might have helped me understand what was going on in your head?"

He pulled me in close and lightly tugged on my braid. “First of all, we spent 3 days in L.A. barely speaking, and then we got home, where you ignored me until last night. That’s not exactly something I wanted to leave on your voice mail or shout across the beach house. Second, I wanted you to decide what you wanted to do based on what was happening between you and me, not what happened between me and Natalia 5 years ago.” His phone rang. “Hold on, it’s Liam. We’re not done with this conversation.”

"Okay."

"Hey," he said into the phone. "Don’t react to what I’m about to say, I don’t want Harry to panic. He was just in my room telling me he felt like someone was watching him last night. Lou and I worked out that it must have been after you talked to Louis."

I left him in the bed and went to look for my own phone. I found it on the floor beside my purse, right where I had dropped it when Zayn pulled me through the door early that morning. No missed calls or text messages. _Might as well get this over with_ , I thought, composing a new text to Kelsey.

 **To: Kelsey Sent: 8:14am**  
Still downtown. Where do you want to meet?

I went back to the bedroom and stood in the doorway watching Zayn while he finished his conversation with Liam. He patted the spot on the bed next to him, and held his arm out so I could crawl right up to him and snuggle in, pulling the duvet over the both of us.

"It’s fine, man. We’ll figure it out. I’ll call you when we get home." He disconnected and hooked his finger under my chin, tilting my head toward him so he could kiss me. "You want breakfast or dessert?" he murmured against my lips.

"Mmm, dessert, please," I whispered back, laying my body over his. Zayn put his hands under my robe and gently slid it off my shoulders before shaking my hair out of its loose braid, so my curls cascaded around us.

"God, this is gonna be the longest 10 days of my life," he groaned, flipping us so he was on top. He began pressing kisses down my throat and into the valley of my breasts. "I can’t keep my hands off of you for that long."

"We could try wearing clothes more often," I giggled as he kissed his way down my flat tummy, sending goosebumps and shivers across my whole body. He ignored my suggestion and instead sucked a love bite into my right hip before moving to the inside of my left thigh, and leaving an identical mark there. "Zayn, stop teasing."

"What do you want, baby?" he purred, flicking his tongue over the fresh bruise.

"Kiss me," I moaned, digging my heels into his back. He crawled up my body and planted his lips on mine. I let him linger there for a few seconds before gently nudging him in the chest. "Thank you, but that’s not where I wanted it," I breathed, grabbing his shoulders and pushing him into his previous position between my legs.

"Oh! Here?" he asked, eyes wide in mock surprise as he placed a kiss just below my belly button.

"Lower."

"Here?" Kiss on my left hip.

"A little to your left."

"Mmm, here?" he teased, hovering his lips right over my bud.

"Yes, please."

"What have you done to deserve it?"

"Zayyyn," I whined.

"Are you ever going to lie to me again?"

"Never, I promise."

"Good girl," he growled, and just as he was about to give me what I wanted, my phone rang.

"Oh, you have got to be fucking kidding me right now! These two really need to work on their timing," I groaned, reaching for my cell. "Hey, Kels."

"Hey," she sighed at the other end of the line. "Where are you guys?"

"We got a room at MGM last night. We’re still here." I covered the mouthpiece with my hand and whispered to Zayn, "Don’t you dare fucking move!"

"So how do you want to do this?" Kelsey asked, redirecting my focus to her.

"Well, my car is still at your house. I’d rather talk there, if you guys don’t mind. Really not thrilled about the prospect of Niall berating me in public."

"He is not going to _berate_ you,” she huffed. “He’s angry, understandably, but I’m not gonna let this be a whole thing. You two are working this out. _Today_. I don’t care if we sit there until the middle of the night. Because I need my maid of honor. We’ve got a wedding to plan, bitch!”

"Wha - maid of - me?!?" I kneed Zayn in the side of the head as I squirmed in excitement. "Oooh oh, sorry, baby," I laugh/whispered, kissing it better.

"Of course you," Kelsey laughed. "Who else is gonna keep me from strangling Niall’s mom when she wants to argue over every little detail?"

"Fair point! Alright, we’ll see you in about an hour." I disconnected and apologized to Zayn again. "You okay?"

"Yeah," he moaned, rubbing his ear. "You got my earring."

"Sorry. Oh, shit, you’re bleeding," I laughed.

"It’s funny to you?" he winced.

"No, no. I’m sorry. Let’s get you cleaned up." I took him by the hand and dragged him out of bed into the shower.

….

What started out as me gently, lovingly tending to Zayn’s injury in the shower very quickly devolved into passionate kisses and then Zayn bending me over and slamming himself into my ass until we were soaking wet, trembling messes. Which was both the reason we were running late, and the reason I was having a very difficult time sitting for the car ride back to Kelsey and Niall’s.

"You alright, babe?" he asked, for what felt like the hundredth time, as we got out of the car in their driveway.

"I’m fine. We’re just gonna have to find another way to relieve the tension for the next few days. Three times in less than 12 hours was a stupid idea. Hot, but stupid."

"The first time was your idea."

"So not even the point," I laughed, quickly brushing my lips against his before I rang the doorbell. Kelsey let us in and grabbed me for a hug before we settled across from each other on the couches. Zayn automatically put his arm around my waist - protective and comforting - while we waited for Niall to come downstairs.

"Do you guys want anything to drink?"

"Some water would be great," Zayn said, giving Kelsey a weak smile. She went to the kitchen to get it, and Zayn kissed me just below my right ear, and whispered, "Everything’s gonna be okay."

"That makes two Sunday mornings in a row you’ve had to assure me of that."

"Hm?"

"At Liam’s. That’s the last thing I remember you saying before I blacked out."

"Jesus, you blacked out last night? How much did you have to drink?" Kelsey asked, coming back with our water as Niall appeared on the stairs. He gave me an irritated look and rolled his eyes before coming down and sitting with Kelsey.

"No, not last night. That’s the other thing we need to talk about actually."

"Okay…"

"Where should I start?"

"Start with the baby," Niall said, a hard edge to his voice.

"I’m sorry, the _what_?” Kelsey asked, looking back and forth between me and Niall, bewildered.

"Um…I was - I was pregnant. Before we left for L.A., I was pregnant."

"You…wait, you knew about this?" She rounded on Niall.

"Don’t be angry with him. I asked him not to tell you. I knew he was planning to propose last night, and I didn’t want you worrying about me the whole time. I just wanted you to enjoy yourself."

"Well, thank you, but I don’t see what that has to do with Greg. Oh, God! It’s not Greg’s baby is it?!"

"NO!" Zayn and I shouted at the same time.

"No," I repeated, patting Zayn’s knee to calm him. "That wouldn’t even be possible. Greg and I only slept together once, and it was 6 years ago. He and I decided that neither of you needed to know. Which was true, until now. I didn’t mean for you to overhear all that in the kitchen with him, Ni."

"I don’t understand what would compel you to sleep with him in the first place," Niall said angrily. "You’ve always known what a selfish man-whore he is."

"C’mon, Niall, you guys have been teasing me about my crush on Greg since middle school. You know how I felt. Yeah, I know how he is, but he was never like that with me. It just kind of happened."

"Please tell me you were wasted."

"We’d had a few drinks."

"Hold on, can we go back to the baby thing? You were drinking last night," Kelsey interrupted.

"I miscarried when we were in L.A. That’s why we ended up staying longer. I only told Niall because we had plans on Monday. Otherwise, you’d both be hearing this for the first time now."

"Are you okay?" she asked, tears forming in her eyes.

"Don’t cry, Kels, I’m fine. We’re working through it," I said, taking Zayn’s hand in mine, showing her we were a united front and everything really was okay. She crossed the room to hug me, but I only embraced her with one arm, refusing to let go of Zayn. I needed his strength to keep me from crying. I let her go, and redirected my attention to Niall. "I really am sorry, Ni, and I hope you can forgive me."

"Are you sorry you did it, or sorry you got caught in a lie?"

“ _Niall_ ,” Kelsey scolded.

"It’s okay. I get it, he’s hurt. I’m sorry I kept it from you, and I’m sorry that you found out about it the way you did. That obviously wasn’t intentional, but I can’t say I’m sorry I did it."

"Then I think we’re done here," he said, not looking at me.

"Hold on, let me explain. I admit that it was a mistake, but it’s a mistake that I think I had to make. I know you don’t understand, but it won’t happen again. Ever. And that’s the best I can do. You’ve been my best friend for 18 years, Niall. I’m not willing to throw that, and an 11 year friendship with Kelsey, away over one mistake. So I’ll give you some space if that’s what you want, but I won’t accept that this is the end of our friendship. I just won’t."

"I’m more mad at Greg than I am at you, to be honest. He’s always known you had a soft spot for him, and I feel like he took advantage of you."

"No one took advantage of anyone. We were two consenting - well, I was almost an adult. If you’re gonna be angry at him for anything, it should be the way he spoke to me last night."

"Yeah, I missed that," Niall smirked, looking at his hands. "What did he say to make you slap him across the face that hard?"

"You didn’t tell me you hit him," Zayn laughed.

"He said I’d come back to him when Zayn leaves me. ‘Like always.’"

"God, he’s such a prick," Kelsey muttered.

Niall looked me dead in the eye for the first time that day. “You should have hit him harder.”

I crossed the room, put my arms around him, and sat in his lap, beginning to cry. “I’m sorry I ruined your night,” I sobbed into his shoulder.

"Hey, you didn’t ruin anything," he soothed, rubbing my back. "She said yes, didn’t she? That totally outweighs this crap with my brother. I’ll deal with him later."

"Okay," I sniffled, wiping my eyes with the backs of my hands, smearing the remnants of last night’s black eyeliner.

"We were gonna order pizza for lunch, if you guys wanna stay," Kelsey said, standing.

"We’re pretty tired," Zayn said quietly. "Didn’t get much sleep this morning."

"Yeah, we should go home." I stood and gave Niall another tight hug. "We’ll set something up for later in the week, though."

Zayn shook Niall’s hand, and when I turned to hug Kelsey, she grabbed my arm and dragged me toward the kitchen instead. “Wedding stuff,” she offered as an explanation to the boys, and shoved me through the door.

"Kels, can’t we pick your colors tomorrow? I’m exhausted."

"Shut up, I don’t care about that right now. Are you really okay?"

"Yeah, I’m fine."

"Lou."

"Kelsey."

"I’m serious!"

"I promise you, I am okay. Don’t get me wrong, it’s heavy, but we’re talking things out. We’ll be fine."

"And the bruises? What the hell is this?" she asked, pulling my top to the side. "I swear to God, if he’s hurting you, Niall is gonna kill him."

"Whoa! Stop that thought train right there! I’m not thrilled about the bruises, but they weren’t caused by anything I didn’t want him to do." I took a deep breath and looked at the floor. "He told me he loves me last night, Kels."

"Did he say it with his hands around your throat while your legs were in the air?"

"Oh my God, stop being so cynical," I laughed. "He said it after Niall proposed, and again when we were at the casino. I’m like 99.9% sure he means it. I think this relationship might be legit."

"Did you say it back?"

"No, and that is such a long conversation that I am way too tired to have right now," I said, stifling a yawn.

"Fine, really quick, then. How did this pregnancy thing happen? I thought you were on the pill."

"Yeah, I was on antibiotics for that sinus infection before we left for Florida, though. So much happened that weekend and it totally slipped my mind. Awful mistake, but it won’t happen again, that’s for damn sure."

"Good," she said, and pulled me in for a hug. "Now go get some sleep. You look like shit."

"You’re such a good friend," I laughed, exiting the kitchen.

" - would never touch her like that," Zayn was saying angrily, pointing a finger at Niall’s chest, when we walked back into the living room.

"Hey! What’s going on in here?" I demanded, turning their attention to me.

"He’s accused me of hitting you."

"Well, I told you that was gonna happen," I laughed.

"Look at your neck, Lou. This isn’t funny," Niall scolded.

"Kind of is since I told him off for it this morning, and I just had this exact conversation with Kelsey in the kitchen. Thank you for your concern, Niall, but it’s okay. Just a minor sex injury."

"Oh, Jesus, don’t tell me that," he said, scrunching his face up as if he was in physical pain. "I’ll never get that image out of my head now."

"Wait, me having rough sex with my boyfriend is more painful for you to imagine than me having sex with your brother?"

"Ah! Shut up! Get out of my house right now," he laughed, pushing me into Zayn until all three of us were out the front door, onto the porch.

I quickly turned so he would fall into me, and wrapped my arms around his middle. “Love you, idiot.”

"Love you, too, loser," he whispered, pressing a light kiss to the top of my head. Then, one arm still draped around my shoulders, he shook Zayn’s hand again. "Sorry for, you know, jumping to conclusions, but in my defense, this one has made some seriously bad boyfriend choices in the past. Didn’t seem like much of a leap in the heat of the moment."

"It’s cool, man. I’m happy to keep reminding her that I’m not like those guys."

Niall gave my hair one more kiss before releasing me to Zayn’s custody and going back in the house. Zayn took my hand and gently led me toward the car, but I stopped, tugging at him to turn him around.

"What is it?"

The massive weight of what we had already been through together was pushing its way through my mind. I knew the second he turned to me, and his honey eyes locked on my chocolate brown ones, that I couldn’t have survived it with anyone else. That I never wanted to. I didn’t want flash-in-the-pan, whirlwind romance with him. I wanted to move mountains. I wanted movies and books and music and poetry written about us. I wanted epic. I wanted to tell him all of this, tell him I loved him back, tell him all of my secrets, and tell him he made the sun rise and set for me…but when I opened my mouth, all that came out was, “Thank you.”

Yeah, I’m a chickenshit. I don’t know why those three little words were so hard to say. He’d said them to me already, it’s not like I had to worry about him not reciprocating my feelings. I think it was more that I was terrified to want it, to want him - no, to need him. To open myself so completely. I was petrified of the possibility that Greg might be right, that I’d let myself love Zayn, he’d leave me, and I’d be even more broken than before. He’d said something, but I was so caught up in my own rushed, panicky thoughts that I’d missed it.

"Lou?"

"Sorry. What?"

"I said, ‘Thank me for what?’"

"For…just…for - "

"You okay, babe?"

"Everyone really needs to stop asking me that," I exhaled softly, and threw myself into his arms, catching his mouth with mine. His body tensed at first, as he let out a small gasp of surprise against my lips, but then he relaxed, smiling into the kiss. A kiss that I was pouring my whole being into, trying to convey everything I couldn’t voice by desperately moving our lips and tongues together.

Zayn pressed his thumbs into my hipbones and slipped his fingers into the belt loops on my jeans, using them to hoist me up, my ankles locking behind his back. He walked forward until my back was up against the side of my car on the street, never breaking away from me, and I was vaguely reminded of our first date, when he’d pinned me to my car, his breath hot on my neck.

"Oi! You’re bringing down my property value, goin’ at it like a couple of horny teenagers out here!" Niall shouted, coming toward us with a shit eating grin on his face. Zayn stepped back, setting me gently on the ground, and I was sure my face was as red as his. As affectionate as we always were with each other, it was rarely this publicly, and we were both morbidly embarrassed at how caught up we’d gotten in our little moment.

"Sorry, Ni," I chuckled sheepishly. "What’s up?"

"You forgot your damn coat. Again," he said, handing it to me and rolling his eyes. "Now go make out on someone else’s lawn, yeah?"

We laughed and said our goodbyes for the second time, and Zayn wrapped his arms around me again once Niall was definitely back inside the house.

"What do you want to do with our afternoon, babe?" he asked, lips brushing against the skin where my neck meets my shoulder. They were pillow soft, in sharp contrast to his rough stubble, which was rubbing my jaw.

I scrunched my shoulders up and giggled at the contact. “Tickles.”

"Do you want me to shave?" he asked quietly, swaying our bodies side-to-side.

"God, no!" I gasped. "I don’t even want to think about your face sans scruff."

His chest shook against me in a silent laugh, “Well, that’s off the agenda, then.”

"Do you wanna just come back to my parents’ house with me? We can just be couch bums and I can probably convince my mom to make us lunch."

"Have you ever cooked for yourself?" he laughed, pulling my keys out of his jeans and handing them to me.

"Why would I? I’ve got you and my mom," I teased, pecking his lips and running around to the driver’s side of my car.

He shook his head, trying to hide a grin, and walked to his own car. “See you there.”

….

Zayn had been a bit of a dare devil, and overtaken me on the road, so he was already standing in my driveway when I pulled in, smirking and waggling his eyebrows at me, smug as a motherfucker.

"Asshole," I laughed, cutting the engine and getting out.

"Wanted you to myself for a minute," he said silkily, pulling my body into his so there was no space between us. With his arms locked firmly around my waist, the smirk came back as he tucked his bottom lip under his front teeth, his eyes trained on my mouth. "Have I told you yet today how beautiful you are?"

"Several times," I laughed, "but I never tire of it."

"That’s good, because you are so incredibly gorgeous and I never tire of telling you."

"You’re not too bad either, Mr. Malik."

He finally caved to his urge and kissed me; softly, almost hesitantly at first, and then deeper, needier, like he was starving and I was the only thing sustaining him.

"Babe," I mumbled, trying to untangle our lips, pulling out of the kiss, but not out of his arms, "you okay?"

"Never better," he smiled, and it was a genuine smile. My favorite one that reached his eyes and crinkled them at the corners in that ridiculously, adorably sexy way. I hadn’t seen that smile since before we left for L.A., when we were joking around in the airport, and I was momentarily stunned by his beauty, getting lost in his eyes.

I regained my composure after a beat or two, and sneaked my hand in the crook of his elbow, leading him to my front door. “I’m home!” I called as we crossed the threshold.

"In here!" my dad answered from the family room.

Zayn and I kicked off our shoes and he dropped my bags at the foot of the stairs.

We found my parents sprawled out on opposite couches; my mom’s nose buried in a book, as it always was on a Sunday afternoon, and my dad staring blankly at the TV, eyes glazed over, not really taking in what he was seeing. He snapped to attention, though, when Zayn and I entered, jumping off the couch and crossing half the room in a single step.

"Hey, Zayn!!" he nearly shouted in his booming, jovial voice, taking Zayn’s hand and clapping him firmly on the shoulder. My dad had gotten over Zayn’s bad boy appearance very shortly after their first meeting. He discovered that they had similar tastes in music, and that was enough for my dad. He’d also told me in strictest confidence how often my mom gushed about Zayn. Apparently, she was quite fond of her newest apprentice, especially since he was so fond of me - and actually treated me well. She had been very openly disapproving, and slightly harsh, when she first found out we were dating, not wanting our relationship to interfere with his education, but also just being really protective of me. She had seen me through every messy, gut-wrenching break-up over the last several years, and wasn’t looking forward to another one, which she must have realized wasn’t coming with Zayn, so she backed off and began to genuinely support the two of us being together.

I leaned down to hug her, but Zayn, unwilling to let me go, locked our pinkies together so that I wouldn’t really have to reach to embrace my mother, but I wouldn’t have to stop touching him either. I sensed he was nervous about something - he never clung to me like this - but I didn’t know what it could be. My parents loved him, and I knew he enjoyed their company, too. I shrugged it off as he gently pulled me back into his side, figuring I’d get it out of him when we were alone in bed later.

"Are you two hungry?" my mom asked, pushing her glasses up onto the top of her head and getting off the couch.

"Thought you’d never ask," I said, grinning toothily.

"Hopeless," Zayn muttered, shaking his head at me.

"Hush, you," I laughed, poking him between his ribs. "She’ll catch on and make me start taking care of myself!"

"Please," she snorted, "I know better! Why do you think I’ve been rooting so hard for this relationship? I’m hoping Zayn will just take you off my hands!"

I dramatically guffawed at her, but Zayn, ever the charmer, wrapped his arms around my waist, and whispered a barely audible, “I’d be happy to,” against my hair, pressing a light kiss to my temple.

"Alright, enough lovey-dovey stuff," my dad laughed, jokingly separating us, and dragging Zayn to the basement to wax nostalgic over some long broken-up classic rock band.

I pouted and followed my mom to the kitchen to help her make lunch for the four of us - and when I say “help,” I mean I sat at the counter and watched her do all the work herself.

"So, I see you two are over whatever little fight you were having," she said with her back to me, taking ingredients from the fridge.

"We were not having a fight," I sighed, "but, yes, things are working themselves out."

"Okay," she replied sassily, but I was grateful she let it drop there. Zayn and I hadn’t yet discussed how, or even if, we would tell my parents about the miscarriage. "Changing the subject, then…How come I had to find out about Kelsey and Niall’s engagement from Maura via text this morning?"

"I told you he was planning to propose last night."

"Yes, but you never called or texted to tell me how it went! Not that I thought she’d say no."

"Sorry, last night was a little crazy. Zayn and I ended up downtown with Liam and Harry, and it’s all a little fuzzy after that, if I’m honest."

"Well, if I’m honest, after Maura told me this morning that Greg is in town, I was surprised I didn’t hear the two of you stumbling in drunk during the wee hours. I know how you and he get when you haven’t seen each other in a long time.”

"Yeah, well…I’m with Zayn now," I mumbled, picking at my cuticles.

"What does that have to do with anything?" she asked, cranking up the heat on the stove.

"Nothing, never mind. What are you making?"

"I’m just gonna do scrambled eggs with turkey bacon and toast. It’s still early enough to count as a late breakfast. Think you can man the toast?"

"I don’t know…Haven’t you heard? I’m hopelessly unable to care for myself."

She smirked and pushed the toaster toward me anyway. “I’ll tell you when.”

….

When everything was almost ready, my mom sent me downstairs to get Zayn and my dad.

"We’re almost done making breakfast," I said, navigating my way through all the junk in the basement to get to them.

"We?" Zayn laughed. "Did you actually have anything to do with the preparation of the food?"

"Hey," I whined, wrapping my arms around his neck from behind and running the cold tip of my nose up and down along the shell of his ear. "I pushed the thing down on the toaster."

"Wow," he said sarcastically, drawing out the vowel, eliciting a playful slap from me. He grabbed my wrists in his warm, slender fingers so I couldn’t hit him again. "Okay, okay! I’m impressed!"

My dad barely stifled his laughter, and went upstairs, leaving Zayn and I by ourselves. When I heard his muffled footfalls over our heads, I let Zayn pull me around him, holding my back against his chest, and he pushed his chin into my shoulder.

"You guys having fun down here?" I asked, snuggling in closer. He nodded vigorously, his bristly beard roughly stabbing my skin. "We need to talk about how we’re gonna handle the pregnancy thing with my parents."

"You haven’t told them already?" he asked, sounding a little surprised. I furrowed my brow and shook my head at him. "I wasn’t sure if they were really okay with it, or just being nice, or didn’t know."

"They don’t know, babe. I didn’t want to tell them without you, and I certainly wasn’t going to do it without your permission."

"Really?" I could hear the hesitance in his voice.

"Yes, really. We got ourselves into this situation together, we should be making these decisions together."

He didn’t respond, but his breathing was ragged. I turned around in his arms just in time to see the first tear falling from his lashes, and caught it with my thumb. “Sorry, I just thought you’d want a say in all this, especially since my mom is your boss.”

"No, it’s not that," he sniffed, drying his eyes. "I just…thank you."

"For what?" I laughed. "I’ve just put your head on the chopping block next to mine."

He exhaled a little laugh and kissed me lightly. “When are you going to stop being surprised that that is exactly where I want to be?”

That knocked the wind out of me, I tried to say something - anything - but my jaw just flapped open and closed uselessly.

"Hey! The eggs are getting cold!" my mom yelled down the stairs, interrupting the moment.

Zayn gently brushed his lips against mine again, and took my hand to guide me across the basement, all evidence that he had been crying gone from his face.

….

We sat across from each other at the breakfast table, silently playing footsie and smiling coyly when we caught each others’ eyes. After we’d finished eating, we snuggled sleepily on the couch, my head in Zayn’s lap, his fingers tangled in my hair.

"It’s too bad Harry’s gay," he said out of nowhere, completely taking me by surprise.

"What?" I laughed. "Random utterance of the day award goes to you."

"I’m just saying, between your curls and his, your eyes, and his dimples…dangerous combination."

"So, you’re sat here thinking, ‘It’s a shame my best friend is gay, because he would make some pretty babies with my girlfriend’?"

"Well, when you say it like that…"

I laughed again and pulled his face down to me so our noses were almost touching. “I won’t say that you’re wrong - our babies would be gorgeous , and I’m sure he’s great in the sack - but I’m really not interested in having gorgeous babies with Harry.”

"So you’ve thought about it?" he joked, pressing his smile to mine.

"You know I have," I murmured against his lips. "Although, now that I’ve seen Liam in his skivvies…"

"Oh, is that what you’re into? All those rippling muscles?"

"Obviously not," I giggled. "You’re a fucking stick figure."

"I’ll show you stick figure," he huffed, dragging me up int his lap, and locking our lips together passionately.

I was trying my best not to laugh because he was being so adamant about proving his manliness, but I failed miserably, and ended up pulling out of the kiss shaking in a silent fit of laughter. Zayn gaped at me, mock affronted, and threw me on my back, tickling my sides.

"I’ll give you something to laugh about," he whispered gruffly, and crawled on top of me, still tickling. I let out a very unladylike moan and then a squeal, squirming under him until I felt that familiar poke on the inside of my thigh. I started to run my hand down his stomach, but he caught me around the wrist and pinned both of my hands over my head. "Not here," he panted, his warm breath heating the skin on my neck.

I was about to give a very cheeky response, but my dad walked in, startling us. We quickly scrambled to a seated position, Zayn using a throw pillow to cover his hard on.

"Was gonna watch the football game," my dad grumbled, shuffling toward his recliner.

I took a deep breath to calm myself before responding, “Well, I think we’re gonna go to Zayn’s, Dad. We’re pretty tired.”

"Yeah, I could tell," he said sarcastically. "You planning on coming home tonight?"

"Umm….probably not," I hesitated, looking to Zayn for approval. He nodded, so I continued. "We’re both off work tomorrow, so we’re just gonna spend some quality time together."

"Riiiight, quality time," my dad joked. "I see how it is. Come over here for a free breakfast and then skedaddle back to the boyfriend’s."

"Oh, whatever," I laughed, rolling my eyes. "I’m gonna go pack some clean clothes. Good to go in 5, babe?"

Zayn nodded and squeezed my hand, a silent thank you for not making him stand yet.

….

Hours later, Zayn and I were naked, tangled together in his bed, fingers playing light melodies over each others’ skin, breathing contented sighs into the still air.

I rolled onto my stomach, crossing my arms on his chest and resting my chin on the backs of my hands. “So you wanna talk about it?”

"About what?" he asked quietly, sweeping my hair off of my shoulder.

"About whatever got you so misty eyed when we were in my parents’ basement."

"I don’t know, I guess you just said some things that took me by surprise."

"Like…" I pressed.

He sighed deeply, causing my body to rise and fall with his. “Like how we should be deciding how to handle this together.”

"Do you not think we should?" I questioned, my eyebrows knitting together.

"No, no! I do, it’s just," another deep sigh, "Natalia. She made all these decisions about how are lives were gonna be when she found out she was pregnant. She completely left me out of the equation."

"Well, our situation is a bit different, babe. Nature did a majority of the deciding for us." I swallowed the lump in my throat, determined not to cry about this anymore, and kissed every inch of his skin that I could reach without moving the rest of my body.

"We should tell them," he whispered when I pressed my lips to his collar bone. "If you want to tell them, we should tell them."

"Are you sure?" I asked, pausing my lips right over the lipstick print tattoo in the center of his chest.

"I’ll go with whatever you want to do, baby. It’s our secret, if you want it to be; otherwise, I’d like to be sitting there, holding your hand, while we tell them."

For a split second, I wondered if this whole situation would have been easier to deal with if Zayn was being a total douche about it. If he’d decided he couldn’t deal and left me. I shook that thought from my mind, and locked my eyes on his. “They could kill us both.”

"In the unlikely event that they kill us," he smirked, pausing to kiss the end of my nose, "it has been my absolute pleasure to love you."

I employed my tried-and-true method of kissing him to make him stop talking, and prayed, harder than I ever had before, that he couldn’t hear or feel the way my heart was slamming into my ribs.


End file.
